Dean the Dick

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"Dean!" You scream from the kitchen to the living room. Your roommate is too busy watching TV because he doesn't acknowledge your calling. "DEAN!"

You take a peek out the doorway, Dean is immersed in watching Dr. Sexy, but manages to answer you between dialogues. "What?"

"I told you to wash your dishes after you're done, I'm not gonna do it for you."

"Relax, princess." He doesn't even turn around. "I'll do it later."

You groan in annoyance, "later? You said that the last time, and I ended up cleaning everything. And I told you not to call me like that." You hate pet names, especially if they're coming from Dean Winchester.

He doesn't even try to deny your accusation. "It was the one time."

"Whatever, do it now." In a low voice, you add, "I can't believe Castiel tolerated your mess."

Dean has a good hearing because he answers. "I can't believe Meg tolerated your nagging."

You know you don't want another full-blown argument to start like two days ago, so you decide to keep your mouth shut for the time being. Living with Dean has proven to be more of a challenge than you would've imagined. It's only been a week, but it feels like a year. You are like fire and water when it comes to living arrangements. You prefer a quiet, clean house, Dean likes to blast his music and leaves the cleaning to the last minute possible. He's not dirty per se , but he's messy. Still, you've managed to only fight once this week. You consider that an improvement, considering the many times you've disagreed.

You step out of the kitchen with a bowl of popcorn in your hands. Today is your day off work, you feel exhausted and the only thing you want to do is go to your bedroom and cuddle watching some dumb TV. Throughout the week, you've only seen Dean in the mornings before he leaves for work, and then at nights. Usually, he finishes working before you, though he goes to the bar sometimes and that's when you get home first. That's probably another reason why you haven't fought that much; you barely had the time. Sundays are the day off you both share, but you really don't want to deal with Dean right now.

"C'mon, princess. Watch Dr. Sexy with me." He's looking at you with a cocky smirk on his face, one you instantly want to wipe off.

"I don't get how can you watch something like that." You complain, "it's barely about medicine, it's just sex."

His smile only gets bigger. "That's precisely the point!"

You really don't want to spend time with Dean. There's a part of you that feels like no matter how hard you try, you and he would never be friends; you are just too different. The inner voice in your head -that sounds a lot like Meg- tells you to give him a chance. Maybe he's not such a bad guy, after all, maybe there's a possibility of you getting along with him. Of course, you won't be able to know that unless you try. You look back at Dean, his eyes twinkle in amusement by your indecision. You know that face, he's about to make some funny remark -or at least something that he thinks it's funny.

"I'm gonna pass." You see his smile fall a little. "Have a good while."

You don't give him time to answer because you scurry off to your room as fast as you can. The house where you live with Dean is nice and cozy, you cannot complain about it. As far as you know, it belonged to Dean's parents, and after they passed away, it became his. He used to live with his baby brother in this same house, but then they left for college. After Sam graduated, he decided to move in with his girlfriend. Nevertheless, even if Dean has a big house to claim as his, you know the brothers have a large school debt they must pay, and that's probably what drove him and Castiel to share living expenses.

The house has two floors. In the lower one, there's a kitchen, living room, dining room, and laundry room. Then, upstairs there are two big bedrooms with bathrooms, an office, and an attic. There's also the garage and the yard. Since the garage is only big enough for one car, the Impala stays there. Your car has to wait by the driveway because, according to Dean, his baby comes first. You don't care about the parking spot.

You reach your bedroom and close the door behind you. Luckily, you have a small TV there, so you don't have to share the one in the living room with your roommate. You turn it on and decide to binge-watch. Anything would be good enough as long as it's not Dr. sexy. For a moment, you lose yourself in the comfort of your room, the greasy popcorn, and the cheesiness of the romance movie you found.

The novelty of your living arrangement leaves your mind. Moreover, the problems that you're currently having at work lose meaning. There's been a new employee at the office that is being a bit of a nightmare for you. As senior, you're in charge of showing him around the ropes of the company. He has behaved disrespectfully and arrogantly. Yesterday, he got you in trouble by claiming you had said something about your boss, which you didn't. It's clear that the man likes to gossip and hates your guts.

Minutes turn into hours, and the next thing you know is that you are waking up in front of the TV after a long afternoon nap. The pop-corn has spilled all over you and there is a trace of drool in the corner of your lips. You wipe it off. The clock says it's 8 PM, which means you've slept more than three hours. Your stomach grumbles, but you don't wish to finish the popcorn. You really could use a nice supper right now. The best course of action is to go to the kitchen and cook something. You turn off the TV and head downstairs.

When you're walking down the stairs, you start to hear a hushed conversation. You recognize Dean's voice immediately. At first, you think he is talking by himself, but once you get a glimpse of him through the banister, you see he's on the phone. For a moment, you continue walking with all the purpose of making yourself known. Suddenly, you hear your name being mentioned in the conversation, and you stop.

"... yeah, man, I'm telling you" Dean is murmuring, "she's acting really hostile." You're not, are you? "And she doesn't want anything to do with me."

Whoever is on the other line of the phone, answers. Dean shakes his head in denial; as if the other person could see.

"She won't even watch TV with me, Benny." Ah, so it's Benny. You know Benny, he's one of Dean's colleagues and also his friend. You met him at one of Castiel's parties, though, you don't know much about him. "Friends? Yeah, right. I don't think that's likely." You're not the only one who thinks it'll be impossible.

You really should cut short whatever this talk seems to be about. You don't like to listen in on other people's conversations. Plus, what Dean is saying is nothing new to you. You feel the exact same way about him.

"Yeah, maybe I should do that, she's really into me." Wait what? Who's into Dean? Maybe you missed part of the talk, and they're not referring to you anymore. Dean says your name softly, as if to reaffirm your suspicion. "You think if I sleep with her, she'll be more tolerable?" What!? You bite your tongue to avoid a lash-out. What the fuck is Dean Winchester going on about? Is he delirious? "It's a good plan, maybe then she even won't forget to lock the door when I tell her to." It was once! "Yeah, I think..."

You blur out the rest of his words. You can't believe what he's saying right now. Foremost, he believes that getting laid is the answer to you being nice to him. Secondly, he's actually sure that you are in love with him, which is not true. You don't know the reasons behind that conclusion. Dean must really be out of his mind because the only way that you could be in love with him is if love meant avoiding him and nagging him the first chance you get. No, you're definitely not in love with him, you can barely stand the guy!

Nevertheless, his big ego is not the most important problem. He's actually planning on wooing you to get on your nice side, without any regard for your feelings, or any real connection you could have with him or anyone else. That's not right. That's why you despise Dean Winchester. Thus, now that you have witnessed firsthand how his little womanizer brain works, you're gonna make him pay for it.

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