Only You

Chapter 2

Elora

I stare at the search results on my laptop screen, briefly reading through the various articles. That's how desperate I have gotten, googling how to stop getting a freaking panic attack every time someone tries to do so much as hold my waist or give me more than a peck.

After practically going into a frenzy before, I decided that feeling bad for myself won't help anyone. I'm getting married. That happens. I have seven months and a few days to figure out how to get over my issues. That'll be enough. I've achieved greater things after all, right?

Though reading how I need to simply "take my time" and "find someone I feel safe and comfortable with", I can't help but feel like I'd have better luck building a rocket ship from scratch. Like, a person I'd feel comfortable with? Doing... that? Where could I possibly find someone like that, and in the span of a few months, no less? There certainly isn't such a person in my life.

I groan and let my head drop onto the edge of my desk, instantly regretting it when white stars dot my vision on impact. I groan once more, louder and whinier this time, before deciding it's high time for me to go to sleep. On a happier note, I remember I have an appointment with my hairdresser in the morning. Marina never fails to lift my spirits.

-

"So, Sweets, are you going to tell me what's tormenting you so we can find a solution and you'll stop making that face and contribute to this conversation? You're too pretty to throw it all away by getting wrinkles at the age of twenty and though we both know I don't mind making eighty percent of the talk, I do live for the occasional sign that someone's actually listening," Marina chides, tugging at my hair hard enough for me to know it's intentional. Despite that, a small smile lifts the corners of my lips.

God, this woman.

I meet her eyes through the mirror, lifting an amused brow and she shrugs innocently. "Sorry, Sugar, your hair is just too thick for my poor hairbrush. It feels especially unruly today," she excuses, the crow's feet at the corners of her eyes deepening with her guilty smile.

Quickly, her expression sobers a little as she holds my gaze. "Is there anything I can help you with, Honey?"

I avert my eyes, shake my head and try to lighten my tone as I mumble, "Not unless you can find me an attractive man I can magically trust and immediately be intimate with."

Marina's booming laugh startles me enough to realize what the hell I just said. Oh, good god! I can feel myself blush furiously as I rack my brain for something to say to salvage some of my dignity but as my hairdresser keeps laughing, I realize there's no going back. No way to live this down.

She'll never let me forget this.

I sink lower into the cushioned chair, praying to just vanish on the spot as the woman behind me catches her breath. Flicking my eyes over the reflection in the mirror to check my surroundings, I can see at least five people openly staring at us. Even though I doubt they heard my comment rather than Marina's laughter, I feel no less mortified. There is nothing worse than drawing that much attention.

"Oh, Honey. You've come to the perfect person," Marina finally says, sounding way too pleased with herself. "I do, in fact, know where you can find what you're looking for." She pauses, studying me intently. "Unless you are too prim for it. Sadly, you have inherited the stick that's up your mother's ass. Partly, at least."

I bite back a groan, the need to squirm in my seat almost undeniable as the embarrassment burrows itself deeper into my bones.

"Oh, don't look so scared, now. Here, I'll just tell you and we can move on to our usual way of conversing," she says. When she doesn't go on, I realize she's expecting an answer so I nod quickly. "Escorts, Sweets. I'll send you the link to where I'm a customer and you don't have to say a word about whether you'll use it or not. All I'm saying is that it's safe, you'll be safe and in control to whatever extent you like, and it is as immediate as it gets. Besides, you get to choose, and let me tell you, the choices will leave you hotter than a summer in Attica."

True to her word, Marina resumes with her usual gossip as if I'd never let those few words slip. Yet I can't fully uphold my part of the deal because as much as I try, half of my mind still obsesses over her words.

I mean, escorts? I couldn't possibly do that. It would be absurd. No matter how reasonable my hairdresser made it sound. Paying a person for sex would be immoral, right? Right, there's no way I'll do that.

————————
Right... there's no way she'll do that...👀
Please don't be shy to lmk your thoughts. I read all of ur comments and they really brighten my mood:)
Have a lovely day<3