"Nicotine had more effect on me than that stupid alcohol anyway"
"Stop crying, my friend ! And put a stupid smile on your face !"
Dad, you know right
I make weird friends sometimes
I don't need to know why
But when he smiles, he cries
I try to make him laugh and enjoy life
I tell him about dreams and pretty lights
I tell him about our future nights
What if he lies ?
I'm pa-paranoid, bad feelings I try to avoid
I wanted to be destroyed
But not that way
Whyyy everything has to be so unhealthy?
I don't know how to feel
That boy just looks so real
But something between us is so unhealthy
"- I'm sorry, not in the mood today, I got so much work, I can't anymore...
- I could make you feel bett-
- Dude, I wanna fuck myself so bad !"
For the very first time, I felt it in my stomach
I thought it was fine, but then I had a heart attack
God gave me the exact thing I wanted
Like a grandma, He secretly put it in my pocket
But something's telling me to stop it
That I'm stupid
:3
I'm pa-paranoid, bad feelings I try to avoid
I wanted to be destroyed
But not that way
Whyyy everything has to be so unhealthy?
I don't know how to feel
That boy just looks so real
But something between us is so unhealthy
I'm not good
With other humans
I always choose
The weirdest ones
I always lose
Empathy and patience
There is no issues
I'm under influence
"- You cannot carry others's sadness.
- Don't worry about him !
- But he said he will kill himself.
...
- And ?"
Whyyy everything has to be so unhealthy?
I don't know how to feel
That boy just looks so real
But something between us is so unhealthy
"- And you ? You came ?
- Hem...yeah"
-VII
