Little One (Will Riker Agere Story)

Ch 4

It reminded her of a morning on Betazed. Waking up to Will cuddled up to her side, holding her tightly as he always did whether he was regressed or not. His thumb was in his mouth, that alone didn't give her definite insight into what mental state he would be in when he awoke.

Deanna tried to wriggle herself out of Will's arms without waking him. She sighed to herself when Will whined and pulled her closer. She really hadn't wanted to wake him.

Will. Imzadi.

Will stirred but didn't let her go. He peaked one eye open at her, pouting slightly around his thumb. He slowly pulled it out of his mouth, he wasn't supposed to be doing that, he was much too big for that.

Deanna offered no judgement, and Will wasn't embarrassed. Perhaps he would have been had it been anyone else. Deanna made it clear from the start that she didn't like him feeling embarrassed by it, especially when he had not done it consciously.

He was small, at least partially so.

"Good morning, Little One." Deanna smiled.

Will whined and pulled her closer, wrapping his other arm around her waist. Deanna rubbed his arm, smiling softly.

"I know you're still so sleepy, but I need you to let me up. I have to get ready." Deanna said.

Stay. Please.

Deanna frowned, "I have an appointment this morning. But I can come back later, if you wanted to stay home today?"

No. He thought. Work.

"Go to work." Will mumbled, slowly letting his mind piece together what he was trying to say, "I need to go to work." He said.

"Okay, Will. Remember no one will think any less of you of you need a little more time." Deanna said.

Will didn't say anything. He lifted his arm so she could climb out of bed and rolled onto his back. He stared up at the ceiling, not thinking about anything in particular, he wouldn't allow himself to.

"Lunch then?" Deanna suggested.

Will nodded. He sat up and scrubbed at his eyes. He didn't exactly feel big, but he didn't feel little either. Everything felt muggy, in some sort of in between.

"How are you feeling?" Deanna asked.

"I don't know." Will said honestly.

"I mean it, Will. If you aren't ready to go back to work you don't have to." Deanna said.

"No. I need to get back on the bridge. I'm tired of doing nothing." Will said, scrubbing his hands down his face.

"All right." Deanna agreed, she could respect that decision, "But promise you won't over work yourself."

Will nodded. He watched Deanna leave and then finally, he got out of bed himself. Will stared at himself in the mirror, he still looked exhausted. He forced himself to brush his teeth and take his medication before getting dressed.

His head was beginning ache. He sat himself on the edge of the bed and rubbed his temples.

His eyes fell to the sippy cup from the night before still sitting on his coffee table.

***

He was crying. Deanna could feel him. Back in his quarters, all alone, he was crying. It took everything in her not to turn around. Her appointment would arriving twenty minutes, it was far too late for her to cancel or reschedule.

She walked into her office and prepared for her session. She pulled up Ensign Tyler's file.

She soon found herself instead looking at Will's report from Malcor III. It wasn't the first time, she had read it before. There was a gap in his account. Not one that would be noticed. Something had happened to him between waking and his escape attempt, and it was hurting him still.