Uncolored || J.JK

Chapter twelve

                              Uncolored.

I don't want to open my eyes.
I don't want to face the reality, that I acknowledge, will hurt me even more.
I'm bored of lookin at those grey, melancholic walls, that surround me, make me unable to breath. There are only monotony and death, lingering everywhere, lingering inside me.

The only thing I wanted, was you.
Not being here, where time seems frozen.
They just come into my room, inject my with who know what and feed me.
There's no the tinniest piece of color, left inside me.
However, what remains invariably, is you.
You've never left my mind and my whole existence.

I don't even have a slightest idea whether it's night or a day. It's already been a while since I lost the perception of time. I'm just stuck here, as if it's been an eternity since they took me here. Or maybe I came here on my own.
Honestly, I'm unable to call my mind.

It had no matter if I could see or not others faces, but then... you came in my life, you were the onliest person whose face wasn't just blended details and features.

In this faceless world, I could only see you!

And I was crazy about them. I was mad about every tinniest details of you face, of you.

Eventually, I let my eyes to see the surrounding .
But, no...
It's not the same.
There're no grey walls, nor that black curtains, that I hated to watch, then I figure out that even the bone-chilling cold is gone, disappeared as if it's never been freezing me.

I see you.
I can't believe my eyes, but you're standing here, at hand.
Having my colors, swirling around you.

You're looking at me, with your brown eyes and I see myself in them.
You haven't changed at all.

I get out of my bed and stand to you face to face.
The warmth,coming from your body, the scent of yours, reaches mine, makes me to wrap in euphoria.

My name sounds so melodic from your throat.

Little sparkles, emitting from the stars above us and the flickers, coming from your eyes...
I feel like it's our universe again.

I missed you.

But you're with me now.
I can have you, forever.

My skin trembles under the touch of your sculpted fingers.
My bottom lip starts to quiver, when you stick yours to them.
Who knows how much I missed your taste, how much I've been craving for your touch.

I want to feel all of you.
I want to have that sensations till death.

You move your lips away and let me breath for a moment.
I lose myself, due to your warm breath, hitting and burning my skin.
" I missed you" a husky of yours doesn't let me to say anything.
No word can slip my mouth.
It's like my brain forgot to work.

However, your soft smile shines from your face.

Suddenly, I feel a strong hit from the inside. It makes me to jump on my spot a bit.
Something starts dawning in my mind.
A huge void formates inside me and I know it will overwhelm me, hurt me if I let it grow.

Your body feels different on mine, it gets weaker to feel.
I take a step away from you.
My hands are shaking, but I still manage to reach it out to you.

The void gets bigger.
As if it's a huge black hole, trying to suck me in.

The sudden anguish strikes me when my hand contacts with only an air, when I try to touch your face.

"Jungkook?!" a tremulous voice escapes my mouth..
You are still smiling.

Why are you see-through ?
Are you just a part of my imagination?!
A horrible misunderstanding grips my mind.

I want to hold onto you.
I want you to never let go, not anymore.
But I can't.
I can't touch you.

I let my consciousness to take the reality in.
Breathing gets harder.
I try my best to not lose the balance totally.

I catch on to what was unknown before, what I couldn't see while being scared of being destroyed.

You are too extraordinary to be the part of my reality.

The pain crashes me like a torrent. It demolitions me from inside.

There's no go back.

Euphoria leaves me.

Color fades.
Gets smaller, collapses and disappears as if it never existed.

My cheeks start burning as the tears find their way from my eyes.

The pulse goes weaker.

The pain still tears me down.
Encloses all my cells.

I don't want to, at least let your presence go.
I want you to be the last thing I'll see.

You're smiling.
You aren't existing, but you're smiling.

What doesn't exist has no color and you've never had any.

You've been living only for me, with thousands of colors, but still without them.

The end.
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Finally!!!
This book came to an end.
Thanks for those all who reads.
I hope the ending will not let your expectations down.
🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻