Touch Of Death || Park Jay

22 ¦ Friendzoned

I quickly brought my luggage to my room and looked at myself briefly in the mirror. Since it was now already colder and the winter slowly announced itself, I wore a large, fluffy, white sweater and light blue baggy jeans. My long, dark brown hair laid in light waves on my sweater, which I liked to some extent. Satisfied, I left my room and braved the cool hallway, down the wide staircase, to the entrance hall. I briefly peeked to the left and right to make sure none of the other boys were around, which wasn't the case, and entered the living room. For a change, Levi wasn't sitting in his reading chair, which made me a little puzzled. Where was he? But that was good, that way he wouldn't overhear Heeseung and me talking. 

I walked through the living room and opened the white-framed glass door to the bright conservatory. Since the living room was usually always heated, a refreshing, cool breeze immediately came to me from the conservatory. I entered the bright room and my feet, which were wearing only white socks, felt the cold emanating from the white tiles of the floor. I shivered slightly, but got used to it. 

Heeseung was not there yet, so I looked around curiously at first. I had never been in the conservatory before, well, I hadn't been able to look in more than once during the housetour. Slowly I shuffled past the large plant in the middle of the conservatory, around which a white bench was built. 

This looked very cozy, just like a small sitting area, with several cushions, on one side of the conservatory, which was behind a bright, wide wooden table. The wide glass windows let in a lot of light, which made it look much more friendly and peaceful. As if one were in heaven. Yes, I imagined the atmosphere to be about the same. 

All of a sudden, it began to pour, as if from buckets. Fascinated by the rain, I stared out of the conservatory into the sky. I was so distracted that I was terribly startled when Heeseung tapped me on the shoulder. 

"Ahhh... don't scare me like that!" I snapped at him with a grin. Smiling, he said, "Sorry, but you looked too cute in your big white sweater looking at the rain... Like an angel." Suddenly I felt my cheeks begin to glow. These compliments were really encouraging. 

I took a deep breath and said, "Please, stop with the compliments!" His smile turned into a surprised expression and he asked in confusion, "Why?" 

Dejected, I looked down at the ground and fiddled with a strand of my hair. 'Now tell him already, you coward! Screamed my inner voice at me. 

"I really like you Heeseung, but I just don't love you with all my heart. You make it beat faster and all, but I don't think you're my love of the life. I just don't want to start half-hearted things that fall apart when we're already much more emotionally attached to each other. That's why I'm ending it before it even starts." I explained and started sobbing after that sentence. I couldn't believe this was happening...

Now I was crying, even though I was rejecting him. He just stood silently in front of me and stared at me with what I couldn't make out. I added howling, "Please, please don't be angry with me! Anything but please not that! Please don't hate me now..." 

After these words, he pulled me into a tight unhug and whispered, "How could I be angry with such an honest and sincere girl, like you, or hate her, huh? Tell me, Miri. While it's really too bad that you can't return my love 100%, I'm grateful that you at least started to feel that way. I love you."