𝐒𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐖 ✭

new mexico kills

After my little... spectacle, the others seemed pretty concerned about me, constantly asking if I was okay and everything. I nodded and told everyone I was fine.

I didn't know how to feel. Apart from embarrassed for vomiting.

Only Percy would've known I had a dream, and afterwards, he made a start towards me multiple times, hoping to get me alone.

Luckily, I'm good at avoiding.

We were now in Cloudcroft, New Mexico. The air was cold and thin. The roofs of the cabins were heaped with snow, and dirty mounds of it were piled up on the sides of the streets. Tall pine trees loomed over the valley, casting pitch-black shadows, though the morning was sunny.

I was shivering under my coat, and I really wished I had brought layers.

I'd kill for a thermal right about now.

Bianca took me to the side whilst we were walking. "You okay?"

"I'm fine. Just got up too quickly y'know."

She didn't believe me. That was obvious enough in her face.

I debated the pros and cons of telling her.

Pro : I feel better, she can give me advice, we strengthen our bond.

Con : currently none that I could think of.

I started with the dream with Apollo, and she listened quietly, nodding every now and then. Then I began to start talking about my other dream, the dream about my mom. But I couldn't. It was too private, too personal. But I wanted to say something.

"My mom. She's in a mental facility somewhere in South Carolina. I had a dream about her. Threw me off a little bit."

"How did she...?"

"Oh. Yeah, I'm not sure. The doctors said it was because she recently had suffered a loss. I was pretty young when it happened, but one day she just switched. Schizophrenia, BPD, some others. She woke up one day out of her mind. Hallucinations, delusions. Eventual paranoia. It got so bad that they had to take her away."

Bianca frowned. "Woah."

"I know, right."

"No I mean... I'm sorry. Kind of. I used to stereotype you I think. Rich girl with the perfect life and pretty and popular and sporty and clever. I had no clue - well, I just assumed that even your family life was perfect."

"I wanted people to think I was perfect." I told her.

"They would've done that anyway. I mean, that month you joined in - what, December or January?- immediately all everyone could talk about was the new girl and how cool she was."

I smiled bitterly. "I joined September."

"What?"

"Yeah. No-one noticed me the first couple months, so I made a promise to myself that from now on, nobody would ever not notice me. I'd make sure that when I walked into a room, all eyes were on me. And it worked. And eventually, it became less of a façade and I fell into it naturally."

Bianca was silent for a couple moments. Then, "I think I'd like you both with and without a façade. You're great either way. Kai saw that. I'm sorry that nobody else did for a while."

I smiled at Bianca. "Thank you. I wish that I had become friends with you. You're really cool."

She blushed lightly.

"Hey!" Thalia yelled behind us. We turned to see that everyone else had already stopped and we hadn't noticed, too caught up in conversation.

Thalia continued. "There's a town. We're stopping here."