this daydream is dangerous | JENLISA

Chapter 4

"So, we have a little schedule change," Marta announced at the end of training. "Our game against the Reign has been switched with our game against the Thorns, so we're going to Portland this weekend and Seattle the following week."

Lisa leaned back and felt her head smack against the side of her locker. She wasn't ready. She'd been trying to be ready for this, but she wasn't ready. She wasn't ready to be in the guest locker room at the stadium she'd called home for seven years. She wasn't ready to see the fans cheering for a team she was no longer on.

She shoved her cleats into her bag and pulled on her slides, not bothering to change out of her practice gear before she stood up from her seat and moved out of the room in the hopes of getting to her car and back to her apartment before she completely lost it with emotion and nerves and anxiety.

But as she turned the corner, where Jennie and Phoebe were chatting, she realized she wouldn't be getting to her car unseen.

Phoebe saw her first, her face lighting up. "Lisa! Perfect timing!"

At the mention of the player's name, Jennie turned around and saw the blonde in her practice gear, and felt a smile make its way onto her face.

"Perfect timing for what?" Lisa asked, feeling her chest tighten with rising anxiety.

"We think goal songs specific to each player would really appeal to our fan base, the Snow Shoers," Phoebe explained.

"That's what they're called?" Lis shook her head.

"Name pending," Jennie offered with an affectionate eye roll.

"Goal songs sound great. Nice job. That's why they pay you guys the big bucks," Lisa mumbled, trying to sidestep the conversation.

Jennie felt her brow furrow at the tone in her voice. "Phoebe, we'll continue this in my office. I'll be right behind you."

Phoebe nodded and scampered off, leaving them alone in the hallway.

"Is everything all right?" Jennie asked, lifting a hand as if to reach out and touch Lisa's arm before realizing what she was doing and slowly lowering her hand back down.

"Yep, I'm good," Lisa nodded, pulling her water bottle to her lips and taking a long sip in hopes of dislodging the lump in her throat.

"I thought we were past you bullshitting me," Jennie replied softly, concern making her green eyes darken in color just a bit.

"I'm not. I'm just- I need to go home and get ready for the travel weekend," Lisa murmured, adjusting her bag on her shoulder to keep busy.

"Seattle should be lovely this time of year," Jennie nodded, still not entirely convinced by the charade Lisa was putting on.

"It isn't Seattle. Schedule change. I think Marta's still here if you need to ask her about it," the player forced out.

"I wasn't made aware of this. Where are we going?" Jennie asked.

"Portland. I gotta go," Lisa croaked, moving down the hallway toward the door that led to the parking lot.

Jennie felt her stomach drop at the revelation, turning to watch Lisa leave with a heavy heart and a worry lodged deep in her chest.

—

Lisa's leg was bouncing up and down incessantly. She hadn't been able to stop it all morning. She was wired and anxious and so incredibly uncomfortable because she knew that seeing her city, her home, was going to make her chest ache more than it had in a long time. 

Jennie slid into the seat next to Lisa, holding a small, paper box in her hands. She noticed the tension in her frame and the anxiety rolling off of her, and she just hoped she'd be able to help in some small way.