Glass Houses || [Noah Sebastian]

05. I see through you

After my momentary breakdown on the front patio, I retreated to the guest room to be by myself. My body couldn't move from the tight ball I wrapped myself into, a blanket thrown over the entirety of my being from head to toe. I've laid like this for the last two days. It was only supposed to be for a quick nap in attempt to reset my mood, but the seconds turned into hours that led into days. The room is pitch black and silent. My mind can't turn off long enough to allow myself to rest for more than a brief moment. My eyes are swollen and sore from the hours worth of tears I've shed, making them burn ever so slightly.

I can hear the muffled sound of distant chatter and footsteps from beyond the closed door. All four of the boys and Missy downstairs in the kitchen making what I assume is dinner and catching up. I figured they'd want their own time to themselves and I couldn't bring myself to drag their moods down with my depressed state. Another long night alone sounds good enough to me anyway. Despite having a history with three fifths of the people in the house, I can't shake the feeling of not fitting in entirely. Like I'm in high school again desperately searching for a place to sit at lunch and being turned away by the kids sitting with their cliques at the mile long tables.

There's a slight knock at the door, pulling me out of my thoughts and causing my body to jerk upward quickly. The heavy comforter sliding off my aching body and pooling around my waist, my hair a disheveled mess atop of my head.

"Come in" I call weakly hoping whoever was on the other side could hear me. On second thought, maybe if they didn't they would just go away and I could continue with my self loathing.

The lock turns slowly and the door creaks open. Even with my room being pitch black, the light glow from the hallway illuminates the figure at the door frame.

Nicks lean upper half tilts in cautiously, scanning the room to find my eyes. His long curly hair thrown into a neat bun at the nape of his neck. I can barely make out his features other than a thick eyebrow being raised on one side. I've known Nick since I was 15, him and Noah being 16 at the time. We met one evening on our daily walk home from school. He stood by himself in an alleyway huffing down a cheap cigarette before starting the trail back to his house. Noah wanted to bum a smoke off of him, and ever since that day they became inseparable.

"Hey Veronica" he pipes up after a moment, his small voice bouncing off the walls in the nearly empty room.

"Hi Nick" I reply back meekly as I try to hide the obvious fact that I've been sobbing almost nonstop for the past 48 hours by whipping my face harshly with the sleeve of my thick yellow hoodie.

"We made dinner if you're hungry" nick says back ignoring my actions, whether on purpose or not he doesn't speak about what he sees or make any indication that he notices my decrepit state.
I grimace slightly at the thought of eating, my stomach turning with a sadness that brews at the pit.

"I'm not very hungry honestly" I admit as I bring my arm up to scratch at the nape of my neck. Awkwardness thickly coats the air as we both  fall silent for a moment, neither one of us being gutsy enough to make eye contact.

"Missy just wanted me to grab you. She said you haven't eaten since the day before yesterday" he says after a moment. His tone is merciful and quiet.
Quite the opposite of what I remember him usually being like. From what I can recall Nick has always been an upbeat person, with a loquacious personality to match. Always cracking jokes and being the most vociferous person in the room. I've never heard him talk so timidly, like he's afraid I'll crumble into dust if he says something the wrong way.

"What did you make?" I ask in hopes to shift the atmosphere around conversation we are having.

"Chicken noodle soup" he replies back cutly, not an ounce of emotion present in his words.