Quest and Tillie

Chapter 16: Don't Fuck With Me

"This is going to be a difficult session," Ellis said to us as soon as we were seated for our second appointment with her. "I'll tell you that straight up. I'm going to be hard on both of you because I want you to think about what happened, what's actually being said and what your thoughts are. You're going to walk out of here feeling like you've been put through the wringer. You're going to have a lot to digest in the next week. I'm also going to be more blunt and straightforward than I will be in any other session. I'm going to call things out and it won't be in a sweet way, and I'm going to do a lot of talking, more than I normally would. This is a no bullshit, no holding back session and it's the way I always conduct what I call the confession session. It's not fun, but I want to get it all out today. Everything that happened, everything that's concerning you, everything that's causing you grief, everything you're thinking about. Understand?"

I'm sure Quest and I were both looking at her with wide eyes, but we said we understood. Then she jumped right in without any more warning.

"Quest, tell us about that day you betrayed your wife and your marriage vows. Tillie, I want you to listen and hold your questions until he's done."

I felt him tense and heard him take a deep breath. "I was getting ready to close the shop. She came running in and asked for an estimate and seemed kind of desperate, so I went and looked at her car. I went in to write the estimate and she started saying shit."

"Keep going. What'd she say?" Ellis asked when he paused.

"Like how lucky Tillie was, how hot I was, stuff like that. I told her to shut up or I wouldn't do her estimate. She shut up, but then she came up to me and rubbed my crotch and I grabbed her wrist and told her to get the hell out. I wouldn't look at her. She told me I looked stressed and she could help, and her hand went to my crotch again. I pushed her away, and God! I was hard but I remember feeling ashamed about that, guilty. She bent over the desk, pulled up her skirt and she wasn't wearing anything underneath. Then I pulled the condom out of my wallet and rolled it on. That's all I remember until I --"

"Until what, Quest?"

He sounded like he was going to be sick. "Until I pulled out. I ripped off the condom and used my hand to finish. And then a cup hit the side of my face, and I turned and I saw Tillie, then she nailed me in the balls with the second cup."

Tears were streaming down both of our faces by this point and I felt like I was going to have a panic attack my breathing was so fast. Quest shoved one of the couch pillows onto my lap. 

"Feel that pillow, Tillie. Now, breathe slow. Breathe in...now breathe out."

He worked with me for a few minutes until my breathing slowed down.

"Tillie, do we need to stop?" Ellis asked, her eyes concerned.

I shook my head.

"OK, then we'll keep going. How did you feel, Quest? When you pulled out of her?"

"Like my life was over because I knew I'd have to tell Tillie when I got home that night."

"And how did you feel when you realized Tillie was right there and had seen you cheating on her?"

Quest popped up off the couch and paced. "Like I wanted to die right then and there. I looked in my wife's eyes and knew I'd destroyed everything."

"Because you did, Quest. You did! And you can't even tell me why!"

"Because the why is stupid," Quest said softly.

"Quest, I've talked to Mark about this and I've read his notes," Ellis said. "You know why. You just don't like the reason."

"Because it's weak."