Orange Iris

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**✿❀orangeiris (り新圧)❀✿**

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It turned out that San had underestimated the strength of his feelings for the thousandth time in the past month.

He had already admitted to himself that he was in love with Wooyoung; wasn't that supposed to be enough?

Shouldn't he be able to stop thinking about him?

Sure, it couldn't be that easy but still, he hadn't expected it to be so difficult.

San was tired.

Again.

And he was tired of feeling tired.

All he wanted to do was stay under his bedcovers from sunrise to sunset to ignore the white buds and scattered petals piling up on the floor.

Just like he had been doing ever since the comeback was postponed.

However, he knew it was only a matter of time before someone hauled him up from his room for practice.

Fucking hell.

The burning in his lungs was not ignorable, the buds came more often and he was so scared of how his feelings only seemed to be getting deeper and deeper.

The garden in his heart was spreading its roots; carving, digging, clutching, and thriving in search of a lost cause, of Wooyoung's light.

The worst part was that he wasn't even mad about it.

You could even call him a masochist because a small part of him enjoyed the pain his love brought.

It was a constant reminder of how intense his feelings were, of how Wooyoung deserved to be cherished even though it was from the sidelines.

San's heart ached with a longing so fierce it made it hard to breathe.

He closed his eyes and concentrated on inhaling and exhaling at a constant pace, yet all he could sense were petals brushing against his trachea, roots wrapping around his ribs, and the unmistakable sting in his throat, signaling another coughing fit.

He let it happen.

Yearning, wishing that when all of this was over, he could open his eyes to Wooyoung's presence.

Not that that was never the case, but it was still a nice notion.

Fingers thredding through his disheveled hair giving him something to focus on other than the pain...

Beautiful doe-like eyes searching his own and grounding his messy thoughts...

Cherry lips mouthing words of comfort against the shell of his ear...

God, he was head-over-heels for that man, emotions touching the clouds and unwilling to come back down.

There was a knock on his door and with practiced ease, San shoved all of the visible petals under his covers before mumbling a barely audible "come in."

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