How a Resurrection Really Feels

9

Oh god, here they go again. Ryan rolls his eyes to himself as the sex noises start filling the entire house for the umpteenth time, echoing from across the hallway. Ever since last night, Spencer and Jon don't seem to have stopped fucking for a second. Well, they do stop but the moments of peace and quiet don't last long. They probably pass out from exhaustion, sleep for half an hour, then wake up and get right back to it. God, he never knew that Spencer could moan like such a whore.

But Ryan understands it, really. It's been a month since they left The Snakes, and a month without getting laid is a long time. He still doesn't want to have this kind of information about Spencer, though. Spencer doesn't moan as loudly nor as constantly as the first time, but hell, can't he just shut up? Spencer is obviously doing this to piss him off. He knows that Ryan isn't getting any and now he's showing off all the great sex he's having.

And what's worse is that Spencer's revenge is totally working.

Ryan tries hard not to get mental images of Spencer getting fucked by Fifty-Two Walker – he knows that Spencer bottoms, not only because Jon is clearly a top, but also because Spencer's made sure to let the world know that he's taking it, yelling stuff like 'Yes! Fuck me!', 'Harder, Jon! Yes, just like that! Nnnggghh, aaaah! Yessssss!'. Ryan's not fucking exaggerating one bit. He doesn't actually imagine Jon and Spencer, in spite of the constant information that they throw around about what they do. All he can think about is that he wants to have sex too, crazy and wild sex, just like Jon and Spencer are having, and all he's gotten lately has been a handjob, which was awesome but, right now when Spencer's loud enough to raise the dead, a handjob doesn't seem to be enough.

Ryan needs sex. He needs his cock inside an ass or a cock inside his ass, hot come spilling onto sweaty skin and then ten more rounds of ruthless fucking. He needs it now.

Brendon's in the room with him, sitting on his bed and taking care of his shot wound. Ryan feels better now; he can even move his arm slightly. Brendon seems to like pampering him though, and Ryan doesn't mind that at all. He rests against the headboard and lets Brendon put clean bandages on the wound.

Brendon glances in the direction of the noises with a slightly scared expression.

"They'll never shut up, will they?" Ryan asks jokingly, just to try and make Brendon relax. He knows that Brendon is not used to sexual stuff, but the kid seems way too tense and it's just sex. Ryan's convinced that somewhere under there is a wild and cock-hungry slut – he just needs to bring it out in the kid.

Brendon quivers an uncomfortable smile at him. Last night, Ryan had to stop Brendon from running to Spencer's room to help Spencer because he thought that Jon was attacking him. It was cute that Brendon thought he could stop Jon from attacking someone. Suicidal, but cute. Ryan managed to explain that they were just fucking. Shortly after, when the growling got louder and the furniture started banging against the walls, Ryan thought for a second that Jon and Spencer were killing each other and his blood ran cold. But then Spencer started moaning loudly about how good Jon was, and not only Ryan, but also all the people back in Resurrection must have heard that they were screwing.

"We should go outside," Brendon offers. Avoidance and pretending it's not happening seem to be Brendon's methods of coping with the sexcapade. Yesterday he mumbled something about how Jon and Spencer should be more considerate towards others, and Ryan thought that, well, it's actually good that Spencer's finally getting laid, but now it's a hell of a lot later and Ryan would like to impose a ban on those two.

"I'm too tired to move," Ryan sighs, motioning at his arm that is now freshly bandaged. He isn't too tired to have sex, though. He bets they'd be louder than Jon and Spencer. God, he could make Brendon moan.

Brendon looks even more uncomfortable. "We shouldn't listen to them... you know. Doing that thing."

"The sex thing?" he offers, amused that Brendon's too bashful to even say it.

Brendon blushes instantly. It's the S word. Ryan wonders how crimson he could turn Brendon if he said that he wants to fuck him slow, then hard, then lick every inch of his skin, suck his cock, jerk him off, make him come...

Right on cue, Spencer groans loudly and cries out, "God yes!" Ryan glares at the door. They need thicker walls. Loud banging follows. What are they doing?

"It's inappropriate," Brendon explains, still blushing. "I remember a sermon father once gave." He clears his throat a little and quotes, "The wise man should love his wife with cool discretion, not with hot desire. The rush of pleasure should not rule him, nor should he leap unheeding into bed. Nothing is nastier than to love your own wife as if she were your mistress." Brendon nods to himself, as if agreeing to such nonsense. "Um, not that you should have mistresses," Brendon then adds.

"That's bullshit," Ryan notes honestly. So people should have sex only when married, but even then they really shouldn't do it. What the hell?

"It's not!" Brendon protests. "And no one should know you do it. And I don't... I don't know why anyone would want to."

Ryan arches an eyebrow. "What?"

Brendon looks unnerved, shifting on the bed nervously. "They sound like they're in pain."

True. They kind of do. And they probably are because Jesus Christ, Spencer has to be sore by now. And asses aren't the only thing that can get sore – dicks can be worn out too to the point of them being oversensitive to touch. Somehow, they just keep at it.

"It doesn't always have to be like that," he tells Brendon urgently. If Spencer and Jon make Brendon scared of sex, Ryan will be so pissed. "It can be soft and slow..." He notices that Brendon's eyes are fixed on his lips, seemingly a bit lost in Ryan. He tries not to smirk. "I could show you, baby," he adds, grabbing Brendon's wrist with the hand of his good arm and tugging Brendon closer.

Brendon, however, doesn't straddle him and volunteer to ride Ryan's cock. Instead Brendon freezes, looking scandalized. "Ryan, don't say things like that!"

Ryan blinks. Why the hell not? Brendon's blushing even more now, and Ryan doesn't get it. "What?" he asks, genuinely puzzled.

"You know we can't yet," Brendon mumbles, looking embarrassed.

What the hell are they waiting for? The world to end?

"Come on," he says softly, and maybe he's whining to get laid. Okay, so he is. He is not below it when Spencer and Jon are getting off in the next room. "It'd be so good. Trust me, I know."

Again, his words cause the opposite reaction. Brendon doesn't say, 'Oh Ryan, you are so right, please take me! You're so hot I can't stand it!' Instead Brendon looks severely alarmed. "You... When you say that you... know, um. What exactly do you mean?"

Ryan's glad Brendon asked.

"I'm the best fuck you'll ever get. I'm the best fuck thatanyone could get. The men who've had me never got over me because I'm that good. And this could be your lucky day," he says lusciously, playing with the fabric of Brendon's shirt. "I'll make your dreams come true, doll face. There's nothing I can't do. I can suck cock like I don't need to breathe, fuck a mouth like a pro... Wouldn't you like that, Bren? We could go slow or hard, and I know how to take a cock, so you can fuck me if you want to. I was born to fuck so just say the word and we'll do it. Anything, anything you want. I mean, I wish I'd lost my virginity to a guy like me, but you? You couldn't have your first time with a guy who's more experienced or better skilled."

Brendon's gone oddly white. He's probably so thrilled from the variety of options that Ryan has just presented to him. Brendon is obviously trying to figure out where to start, and Ryan can't blame him. God, he's getting hard just thinking about all the things he just said, picturing himself and Brendon doing all of them.

"You've done it before?" Brendon asks, his voice quiet.

"Loads of times with loads of people!" he assures Brendon before he gets why Brendon seems so reserved. "You... didn't think I was a virgin, did you?" he asks incredulously, and when Brendon says nothing, he bursts out laughing. "My god, now that'd be a disaster! Picture two virgins fucking! Jesus Christ, now that –"

"Don't say our Savior's name in vain!" Brendon barks out of nowhere, and Ryan shuts up. He stares. Wait. Brendon's angry? Why the hell would he be angry?

Brendon's eyes have swelled up, and Ryan is so not on the same page. He's not even opened the book. "I'm going to hell," the kid breathes out in horror, more to himself than Ryan. "I'm marrying a man who's not a virgin. Oh God, He will not overlook that, and I –"

"Wait. Wait. Marrying?" Ryan asks abruptly, feeling horrified. Marriage? When have they ever – They are not getting married. What the hell, no one gets married anymore except crazy sect members who live in the countryside and– Oh. Resurrection people get married. But Brendon didn't honestly think that they were...

"My future husband's sinned! And not with me!" Brendon says, utterly upset, as a few tears now spill onto his cheeks.

"Whoa!" Ryan says, holding his hands up defensively. "We are not getting married!"

"Well how could we now?!" Brendon asks. "When you're impure and –"

"We were never getting married!" he objects, and Brendon instantly stands up, staring at him like Ryan's just stabbed him.

"What?" Brendon breathes out, looking more scandalized and hurt with every second that passes. "But you said we were! I thought – I thought you were going to give me a proper engagement ring any day now! I've been waiting for that ring!"

"There is no ring!"

It's like they're speaking different languages. He stares at Brendon in astonishment, and the kid only looks at him like his heart's been broken.

"We're betrothed! You said we were!" Brendon cries out loudly and desperately. Fuck, that stupid word again. How can a word that made Brendon so horny before now make him so angry? Ryan is even more confused.

"Yeah, so? I said it and you were happy about it! What's wrong with that now?" he asks, feeling slightly upset. He just offered himself to Brendon, and he doesn't do that easily. Or maybe he does, but not to just anyone. There's a long waiting list to get a piece of his ass, and this kid is resisting what has got to be the most tempting offer of all time, and after all the things they have done, Brendon isn't taking it? What fucking nerve!

"So?!" Brendon repeats in disbelief, stunned. "It didn't mean anything to you? How can you treat something that sacred like it means nothing?! Is this a joke to you?! You said you loved me! The other night you said it!"

Ryan frowns, trying to remember. "You mean when you gave me a handjob?" he asks, laughing a little.

Brendon's eyes go wide and he then covers his face with his hands, shoulders slumping. Oh, please, he thinks that now is the time to act like a prude? Ryan doesn't remember asking him to touch his cock, so what's Brendon playing at?

"Oh, God," Brendon mumbles, his voice faltering, and he removes his hands from his face. Ryan can see that in addition to Brendon's watery eyes, his face is also now a deep red. "You told me that because of what I was doing, didn't you?"

"Well, duh. And I loved you for what you did! You were amazing, Brendon," he says, trying to encourage the kid. Maybe Brendon's feeling nervous to fuck with a sex god like Ryan? Ryan wouldn't blame him. "The handjob was really good, so just imagine if we fucked! We –"

"Shut up! Just shut up!" Brendon yells at the top of his lungs, making Ryan startle. Brendon never yells except, well, when they kidnapped him and when his father didn't want him back. Okay, so Brendon does yell quite a bit, but not at him.

Spencer's raspy and annoyed voice echoes through two doors with a, "Would you two shut up and let us fuck in peace?!"

Ryan didn't notice that the sounds of monstrous fucking had ceased. It's too much for Ryan to bear. Brendon is going insane and Spencer asks for a bit of peace and quiet? Yet, Brendon seems to feel guilty as he calls out "Sorry!" to the direction of the door, looking embarrassed. Then he turns to Ryan and, instantly, the anger is back. Brendon steps closer to him and venomously mutters, "You've been playing me just to have... sex with me, haven't you? That's all you've wanted since the beginning. Sex. Not me. You've lied to me all this time, you –"

Brendon doesn't finish his words. Instead, he walks to the door and once there turns around. He looks angry and sad, but there is also a sudden determination in his shoulders, his chin held high. "And don't even expect me to come back to feed you or to take care of your wound!"

Brendon slams the door closed after himself, and Ryan just stares, completely dumbfounded and alone with Spencer's wild moaning in the background.