All The Little Lights

Chapter 47

Alexia

"If I get my hands on that bastard I'll chop his dick off and feed it to the street dogs.! Who the fucking hell does he think he is? That motherfucker! Wait till I get my hands on him, I'll show him what hell really is..!" Gwen growled as I sat there quietly, fumbling with my hands.

"You need to calm down Gwen, your anger won't solve anything. We have to find him first." Kevin said as calm as he could with his jaw ticking from the suppressed anger.

"Are you okay.?" Helen asked finally, after a long silence.

"I am better"

I don't know how I managed to say everything to them in my sober state. Recalling that night is still a torture. It doesn't matter how old the scar is. But remembering is like peeling it open just to stab it again and again till it bleeds.

For once, I was thankful for my drunken state that night when I spilled everything to him. I wasn't clear-headed and that made everything more easy. I didn't even want to recall saying all that to Aarvin of all people.

But today I had told them all about me. My past.

I needed to show them those shattered pieces of me just like they had done with theirs.

So we could mould a better us from the same pieces, even when scar remains, it's still a reminder that we tried. They have shared their past with me and I wanted to do that too. We are in this together and they've the right to know everything about me and Jake.

And I did.

Everyone was here including Aarvin and Nordin.

Aarvin was silent throughout my talk and didn't once interrupt. He was sitting in one of the chairs with his arms crossed on his chest.

I was shaking inside even when I put a brave front outside. I spoke like it was just a part of my past, but I knew, all of them here know, that it was still as fresh as the day it all happened.

But they didn't point it out. Because they too know, that some wounds take much longer to heal. To become a scar which will forever be adorn your soul to remind you how strong you are. How much you've endured to become you.

But even though he was silent, he gave me the comfort I was seeking. He didn't move his gaze from mine throughout the time I was speaking. Not even once. He was encouraging me to go on. To pour it all out.

"I give you one word Lexi." Nordin who had gone completely silent on hearing me, voiced. His hands were clenched into a tight fist.

"We will make him pay." His green eyes darkened with anger and vexation of all these years.

I nodded, "We will"

I was not able to complete the sentence wholly before I found myself enveloped in a tight comforting embrace.

"You're okay. Right?" Kevin mumbled tightening his hands around me.

"I am.." I nodded into his shirt, hugging him back.

"I know it hurts like a bitch, but you're going to come out of it all the more stronger." he said, or more likely, stated to himself making me chuckle.

"I'm alright Kev" I smiled leaning back.

"Yeah. You don't have to make her cry with all your hugging and comforting. You stink" Helen grunted covering her nose while making a disgusted expression, making me groan.

"First of all, I was trying to make her feel okay and it was because of my hug that she feels alright now. And second of all, I don't stink" Kevin retored.