Assigned Partners

Chapter 2

a/n: Trigger warning- Self harm mentions

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After music class, I headed off to Spanish. Lets be real here, I can speak the language better than the rest of the class. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I've known it since I was little. I could skip the class for two weeks, and my grade would still be higher than the people I'm stuck with in that room. It's fine though. The class is a little over an hour, I can deal.

Leaving there, I walked through the hallway to get to my locker. I kept my head down for the most part, but I really didn't feel like knocking anyone else over today. Running straight into Normani this morning was more than enough embarrassment for one day. So far I was doing well. I made it to my locker in one piece, and I didn't hurt anyone. I opened it quickly, and swapped out my books for my math books and my sketchbook.

I heard a snicker behind me and I swallowed hard. I turned to see who it was, and I pulled my books closer to my chest.

"Well, if it isn't the schools most recent outcast," Austin said, nudging Camila in the arm.

I rolled my eyes. Austin was a dick. He was a football player, he was dating Camila, and he basically has it in his head that he's hot shit when he's really not. I'm not Camila's biggest fan by any means. She has her moments, but she tends to be really self absorbed, and can come off as a bit of a ditz. Oh, and her taste in guys is crap. Clearly, since she's been attached to Austin's hip since around the time I got to this school.

"What do you want, Austin?" I asked quietly, looking down.

He pulled my sketchbook out of my hands before I had a chance to react. I tossed my math book back into my locker, realizing that it was still open. As I looked back, he and Camila were flipping through it. I clenched my eyes shut as I listened to them whispering. I couldn't make out much of what they were saying though. They were good at this.

That's when I heard the rips.

Pages of my artwork were being torn out of the book and ripped up. Some of them he handed to Camila to crinkle into a ball. All of the ones he handled were now being sprinkled around like confetti. I had put hours of my time into each picture individually. And now it was being destroyed.

"Austin, please!" I pleaded, feeling the tears prickling my eyes. Fuck, I thought, not here.

Camila almost looked sorry for what she did. I knew that she wasn't though. There was no way. Austin tossed my book across the hallway and took Camila's hand, walking away.

I sunk down to the ground as the bell rang. The hallway started to clear out. My fingers moved to the ripped up pieces of paper, and a tear finally freed itself, rolling down my cheek. I picked up a piece of my artwork, making out part of a landscape I had drawn while I was in the car on the trip from Miami to LA. I had worked on it for the entire drive. And now it was in pieces.

I picked up one of the sketches that Camila had crumpled, and I smoothed it out as best as I could. It was a charcoal sketch of a bird I saw a few days ago. It was smudged a little and it was wrinkly, but at least it was still in one piece. I pulled it closer and let a few more tears fall. I was alone right? Nobody would be seeing me like this. I picked up all of the ripped up pieces of paper, and stood up. I went into my locker and shoved them into an empty pocket of my backpack.

"I'm so sorry Lauren."

I froze. I didn't think anyone was still out here. I was too distracted by my own feeling and my destroyed art to notice. I turned and faced Normani, who had my sketchbook in her hands. Just looking at it, I could see how much lighter it looked. It looked smaller, thinner. To a normal person, they might not see it, but I looked at this book every day. I could notice the difference. I had the shredded pictures to prove it.

"Don't. It's fine," I stated, taking my book out of her hands. I shoved that into my backpack too, and sighed. "I didn't think you were here. I assumed everyone had gone to class."

"I was on my way out of the washroom," she said, gesturing to the doors a little farther down the hall. "Look, I can talk to Camila and Austin, I'm sure they won't do it again."

"Normani, it's fine," I hissed, clenching my hands into fists.

I grabbed my backpack, zipping it up. I slung the heavy black bag over my shoulder and locked my locker. I started walking away from the cheerleader. She and I both had math together right now, but I didn't care. I didn't want to be there. Not today.

"Lauren, we have class! What the hell are you doing?" she called out to me, throwing her hands in the air in confusion.

"I'm going."

"Wait, but you can't leave leave. We have to work on the project later!"

I rubbed at my eyes, knowing that my makeup was smudging. I probably looked like a raccoon at this point. I didn't reply back, and I kept walking. I'm pretty sure she muttered the word bullshit, but I don't care. I knew something like this would happen. I wouldn't be surprised if Normani knew it was going to happen. She and Camila were best friends after all.

I left the school and went out to my car. Whether or not I was going to come back later was going to be a last minute decision. I just knew that right now, I was too worried about the rest of the school day. I had a class with Austin. I didn't want to face him. It made me anxious just thinking about it.

Sitting in the front seat, I gripped my steering wheel tightly. My knuckles slowly started going white. I bit down on my lower lip, not wanting to start crying again. I hated it. It was apparently inevitable, because they started to fall once again, despite my attempts to keep them in. This was all too familiar. This happened to me once in Miami. All this incident did was trigger me. It brought up that day vividly in my mind.

"You're pathetic Lauren. And this, this is all shit. You know that you have no talent, don't you? You can't draw. You can't sing. You are nothing."

Michael had said those words to me a lot, I had known him for years, but those hadn't been the worst part. Instead of ripping the drawings out, he ran outside with the sketchbook. As he spoke to me like that, he slowly started to submerge the book into the fountain, I remembered.

"You should be thanking me. Now you won't cause anyone else eye damage. You're going to cry aren't you? You're such a pussy. Go run home and cry. Nobody cares, Lauren. You could stop existing and nobody would give a fuck." he spat.

I hadn't noticed that my tears were falling harder now. I wiped my eyes with my sleeve, and glanced at the way it started to rise up my arm. I pulled it down quickly, seeing the cuts there. Shaking my head, I turned on the car and pulled away from the school, heading home.

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a/n: This update was finished a lot quicker than I thought it would be, but I hope you enjoy!