The Way of Things

Five

Five

Nathan went away for a two-week-long business trip. And during that next week, Ahasuerus stopped by my martial arts studio each day, making my heart lighter with each visit. He always brought sweet treats, which we shared as we talked. Each night we went for walks on the beach and dined at a beachside bar and grill on The Strip. My time with him had become the highlight of each day for me, and my feelings for him grew, becoming far stronger and deeper than what I felt for Nathan.

One Saturday evening, he came to my place and told me he loved me, begging me to marry him and not Nathan. I had come to love Ahasuerus deeply, but I didn't want to hurt Nathan. He was a nice man and had been very good to me. As it was, the guilt was eating me up inside. I was being unfair to both men, a weakness that I prayed to be forgiven for each and every night.

Taking my hand, Ahasuerus said, "Before you go through with the marriage, would you pray about it? A decision this major should not be made without asking God if it is right."

He was right. I knew this. Maybe the apprehension I had been feeling since the day Nathan proposed had been the Lord trying to tell me my decision wasn't right. I had just been too stubborn to listen. And maybe my stubbornness was the reason I hadn't felt the same closeness to Him . . . that is until the day I heeded the prompting to take Ahasuerus's tour. I'd wanted to believe that meeting Nathan was a blessing from the Lord.

But what if I was wrong?

"I don't know," I finally answered, afraid to face the truth. Despite realizing that my decision to marry Nathan had been wrongly-motivated, I had grown comfortable in the knowledge that I would soon be living an affluent lifestyle with him, the kind of life I had dreamed of having for a long time. But that shouldn't be the case.

How have I let acquiring material possessions become so important?

Ahasuerus squeezed my hand gently. "Would you come to church with me tomorrow?"

"I haven't been to church since I was a child," I admitted, embarrassed.

"Then come with me. If you don't enjoy it, I won't pressure you to go again. Please just come."

"Okay," I finally agreed. Nathan wouldn't be back for a few more days, so it would be okay.

~~~~~

The next morning, I attended "church" with Ahasuerus at a friend's home where they met together each week and shared what they'd learned during the past week in their personal Bible studies. Hearing more about God and the sacrifice of His Son, Yeshua, was amazing, and the spirit accompanying the words and feelings shared during the meeting pierced my heart, bringing back memories of my church visit as a child, only the numbers in attendance here were far fewer. It was a home filled with warmth, and I wondered how I could have lived so long without such wonderful fellowship.

"Thank you," I said to Ahasuerus as he drove me home. "Thank you for sharing that with me."

"You are welcome."

Before getting out of the car, I told him, "I promise to pray." Then I kissed his cheek. He rewarded me with a loving smile in return.