fake my legacy | jukyu

chapter one.

a taste of medicine
)
changmin's pov

life is the worst. life is annoying and a pain in the neck. i hate waking up everyday and going to the bathroom to take a leak and afterwards brushing my teeth and cleaning my face. i hate the sound of my mother's knocking at my door and i hate the way i need to change into a different outfits every other new day. i hate looking at myself in the mirror because i am always reminded who i am and what i do.

i not only hate life, but i hate myself too.

i despise myself like everyone else does too.

i don't mind their hatred, i don't mind anything really. because in the end i know i am at fault and i am doing nothing to change my attitude and ugly personality. but, is there actually something i can do about it?

if i change, will everyone love me like hatred was never in the hearts? will i be given smile whenever i walk by, or will i receive new nice peaceful conversation? likely, yes. but, i suppose that won't happen quite yet. actually, i don't think that'll ever happen. i've been the same changmin since i was little. and then i grew and learned a few different ways in life, and then i got stuck there, maybe for forever. there's nothing i can do to make people love me anymore.

i have three older siblings, and they're all females. i'm the only boy in the house. and to think parents should be happy they at least one son, mine are not. my parents despise me as well. my mother doesn't like me for obvious reasons, and my father has no interest in me. he doesn't care if he doesn't teach me how to fish or how to work out or how to change an engine tire or whatever, i am nothing to him. and he is nothing to me too. i don't really care.

in four days i am supposed to find myself a fake partner. a fake soulmate, to be specific.

if you're wondering why, it's because my family, and i mean my whole family (uncles, aunties, grandparents, cousins, etc) are to be "paired" by the age of 18. it's part of our legacy the say. and it's crazy as hell! i don't even understand it myself, but apparently i'm supposed to be in love with someone and they're supposed to be my soulmate for life, and i'm supposed to represent them to the family "in hopes" to get their approval, but in the end i find myself thinking that it all just depends on what my relatives say.

i've been lying that i have a partner already, and in four days i am supposed to introduce them to my family. uncles, aunts, cousins, grandparents are supposed to be coming in four days to approve of my soulmate. crazy, huh?

seriously, what kind of family legacy do i live in?

ugh, so annoying.

anyway, i don't know who i am going to bring but i can't just go home without no one by my side knowing already how my family would react. relatives would come for nothing and that would piss my parents off; i don't want to deal with any of their nagging at the moment.

i'm not worried about who i am going to bring because i know that what i want, is to not get their approval. meaning, i probably need to bring a guy to the court. if they see i like men, then they'll freak out and most definitely leave me without getting a partner and i'll finally be left at peace.

so, in conclusion, i have to find myself a boyfriend. not a girlfriend, understand?

i don't really care about the sex thing, i know i'm a guy and he's guy but i like girls. and it's not as if they'll approve of whoever i chose, my parents are most definitely homophobic.

i was thinking of asking my only best friend, sunwoo, but my parents already know he's dating someone already. they won't fall for it, and it'll only make matters difficult if they figure out what i'm trying to do. so, i need someone different. someone new.