Firehouse Child

2

Astrid

Quiet is overrated. In my opinion at least. But I mean quiet in day to day life. Like if you meditate, it might be peaceful. I tried meditation once but all I could hear was the screaming in my mind. Like sitting in an endless white space with nothing to calm you but whatever is trapped with you in your head. Plus there were crying kids in the background. There is nothing peaceful about meditation. It's stressful when there is nothing going on. It makes you feel exposed, isolated even, when there is nothing to bring you back to reality. And I could not be any more exposed.

Coming into the fire station might have been a mistake. I've gotten my stupid self involved with all these people that are too kind for me and there was no coming back from that. The brunette sitting across from me was too nice to let go of me and my life that easily, I imagine, without really trying to fix it. And then there was Maya. Beautiful-named Maya. She was who my day had centered on. Always thinking about Maya. I don't know why I was so obsessed with her, but she drew my attention anyhow.

I felt exposed sitting here with Carina. What if she thought I ran away? I've learnt that it's hard to get people to believe you if there's no one else to confirm it. Especially when you're a thirteen year old girl raised badly. I hope she didn't think that, I wouldn't want her to think any lesser of me than she already does.

Downstairs, I could hear the door to the hall open and the engine coming in. The moment I had been waiting for. I waited impatiently for Maya to come back, rocking viciously on my chair and tapping with my fingers. After the longest minute of my life had passed, Maya and a whole team of firefighters came chatting happily into the beanery. But then as they approached, they smelt hideously of burning, as expected, but it still hit me out of the dark. The rest of the people didn't seem too bothered with my being there. I guess Maya told them. Although, some of them came over and smiled at me or shook my hand or something like that. For a split second, they reminded me of my siblings. I hadn't thought about them for a bit. Let's hope they were still asleep, because mom would definitely not be up yet. One can only hope.

"Hey. This is the rest of 19. 19, this is Astrid," Maya introduced.

They all waved at me with big smiles on their faces. They all looked so jolly. It was unnatural. A man called WARREN sat next to Carina and Maya sat next to me, taking care that I ate the whole sandwich. It was refreshing to have someone care. Like I've stepped into new territory.

"Honey, I've called social services and they know about you. It's gonna be a while, so you're going to have to hang around here for a bit," said Maya, watering down what I knew would happen: social services would arrive and interview me to juice out what I know so they can dig to find the wrong truth and take me away from the nice people.

Carina was struck with an idea, you could see it in the glow of her eyes. She scraped her chair back against the floor and, with a small motion in her hand, called Maya over to the corner of the kitchen. I watched in curiosity as they talked seriously and every now and again, looked or pointed at me. Maya nodded at what Carina had to say. They looked as if they were diciding the winner of a talent show. Carina went to sit again across from me and Maya came to the chair next to me.

After looking at me then Carina, me, Carina, she said, "Carina just told me about your siblings and how they are the reason you want to go back."

Oh god. What now? Was she going to put me in foster care? That's been my worst nightmare for ages. I could feel the beads of sweat escaping from my forehead.

"And when the social worker gets here, we are going go have a talk with her, so maybe you can get to them again," she finished.

I was amazed. This might be the greatest news I've ever had in my life apart from mum saying 'I'm having another baby' time and time again.