Loving Kinnick (Rewritten 2023)

Chapter One

The evening coaxed the sun from the sky, and as quickly as the day fell into night, the temperature changed, reminding me that autumn crept up on our small town, and I had been oblivious to its arrival. Despite the silence, my father's words played on repeat. They were a loop I couldn't escape. I stared at the brick building; my head cocked to the side, as if changing my perspective would help me understand how joining a boxing gym would improve my mental health.

He listened to my every protest. Then I caught a glimpse of hope in his eyes. Perhaps he believes this will save me. The look he gave me said, 'I already lost your mom, and after almost losing you, I will try anything to make me believe you are getting better.'

The moment his brown eyes glossed over; I realized this wasn't to improve my mental health but to reassure him we can move on from 2017. Now I'm standing outside of this brick building trying to find the same motivation to go inside.

My gaze lifted from the window to find the neon sign above me, swaying in the wind as it buzzed. The red-light casting upon me made all this feel more like a secret society. Something stirred in my stomach, and had it been anxiety, I would blame it for my shaking hands, but my fingers trembled so often that I couldn't decipher the cause. I focused on the buzzing sign as my fingers brushed the aluminum door handle. All I had to do was pull, and I would be a step closer to suppressing my fear—one I wasn't aware of.

"Are you lost?"

My heart pounded beneath my palm as I stared at the hooded man before me. "Uh—I–I don't think so."

His stature towered over mine as he leaned forward to pull the door open. "Go ahead."

The draft of warm air accompanied the music playing from the speakers inside. As they rushed to welcome me on the sidewalk, the hooded man pointed toward arrows on the walls. He said if I followed them correctly, it would lead me to John's office. Before I could thank him, he disappeared into a hallway, leaving me to wander the empty gym alone.

My fingers brushed over the leather punching bags as I approached a wall of black and white photos framed in gold. In this town, John was infamous for training champion boxers. The tattooed boxer appeared in most of the images, sporting a belt across his shoulder. Newspaper clippings reported about heavyweight boxer, Kinnick Carson, who never lost.

"Bo, I'm glad you could make it."

I turned to find the man with dirty blonde hair beside me, and memories of him visiting my mom came rushing back. "How are you, John?"

His embrace felt familiar, like a welcome back home after being away for far too long. "I've never been better, kid."

"I'm sorry for the circumstances."

"When your dad reached out to me, I couldn't believe it," he stepped away to pat my shoulder. "Thank you for choosing me, Bo. I'm not a counselor or therapist, by any means, but I will do my part in helping you, okay?"

"My mom trusted you, and I never questioned that woman."

The wrinkles beside his eyes deepened as he motioned me to follow him. He didn't say another word as he turned toward the hallway. My dad informed John of my past as if it would be a tool reliable enough to fix me. No one needed to know I spent time in the hospital after an attempted overdose. As long as my dad believes this to be the start of my healing journey, who am I to question him?

John closed the door behind me as I slid into a seat before his desk. "Your dad handled the expenses for the month, but I will not blindside you. I know, or at least know, a fraction of what you went through, and let me say, it will not affect how I treat or train you. I have no expectations. I'm not in a place to ask questions. While your father believes to know what he wants you to gain from this experience, I want to hear it from you, Bo."