✓ Let Me In (Sunsun)

Chapter Ten: I Don't Remember

A/N: Love In The Dark by Adele is such a pretty song....I cry. 

Aggressive knocking at the door jolted Sunghoon awake. His eyes fluttered open and he groaned in pain as he moved his stiff limbs. Why am I on the floor?

"Yah, you better open this door right now." Jay warns from the other side. Sunghoon picks himself off the floor and unlocks the door. Jay opens it and stands in the doorway staring at him.

"You look like a run over skunk." Jay tells him, crossing his arms. Sunghoon closed his eyes and rubbed his head.

"That's what I feel like." Sunghoon mumbles.

"I told you not to drink so much, but you did anyway. Do you even remember what you did last night?" Jay asks. Sunghoon furrows his eyebrows and stares at the ground. Honestly, no...he didn't remember anything. Still, he felt something chewing at the back of his brain, something he was supposed to remember.

"Didn't think so. Thankfully you made it back to your room before passing out." Jay says. He looks behind Sunghoon and notices the perfectly made bed.

"Did you sleep on the floor?" He asks. Sunghoon sighs and runs his hands through his hair.

"I guess so."

Jay examines Sunghoon, his swollen eyes, red marks from laying still so long...and the disgusting but concerning dried snot.

"What hell man, did you cry last night?" Jay asks. Sunghoon covers his face. He had no idea what he looked like, but if Jay was asking that, it probably meant he didn't look good.

"I don't remember, probably. I guess I'm an emotional drunk..." Sunghoon pushes past Jay and stumbles into the bathroom. The reflection looking back at him didn't look like him at all.

"What the heck happened last night?" Sunghoon whispers to himself.

Meanwhile, Sunoo laid awake in his own bed. He hadn't been able to fall asleep at all. Half the night was spent staring off into space, the other half was spent crying with his thoughts overwhelming him. After he had told Sunghoon to leave, he had locked the door and hid under his blankets. What had just happened?

And then he had to wonder why he allowed it to happen. It just happened so suddenly. One moment, he was concerned Sunghoon would fall over, the next, their lips were pressed together. Sunoo couldn't remember what Sunghoon had said between those two moments, but the horror of it made his chest hurt.

It's wrong. It's so wrong. Sunoo just repeated those words to himself for hours. Part of him wanted to scream and throw things around, but the other just wanted to sit in a corner and cry. He was angry and sad at the same time and the confusion sent him spiraling into a dark rabbit hole of emotions. Above everything, he was afraid.

How was he supposed to face Sunghoon again? After last night, how was he supposed to act around him? How could he continue to smile and talk comfortably with him when he knew he would only be able to think of what happened?

"Damn you, Park Sunghoon." Sunoo hissed into his pillow.

Sunghoon's words haunted him. "I thought you felt the same when you...did it back." Sunoo covered his face with his hands. Sunghoon was right, he had kissed him back.

And that upset him because there was no logical explanation why he would have done so. It felt like it was someone else...he had completely lost his grip on reality in those moments and only really realized what he was doing when he felt Sunghoon's hands on him. Why didn't I pull away? Sunoo's thoughts pounded at him, just furthering the confusion. Why would I do that?

And then the tears started to flow again. Because no matter how many excuses he tried to make, no matter how many different ways he tried to imagine it; the truth stayed the same.

Sunghoon had kissed him, and he had kissed back. And he didn't know why. All he knew is that he wished it hadn't happened.

And he knew things could never be the same between them.

—---------------------

"Sunoo? Are you awake yet?" A small voice called, lightly tapping on the door. Sunoo flew out of his bed and fumbled with the lock before swinging the door open, pulling the boy into a sudden hug.

"Huh? Are you okay?" Ni-ki asked with concern. This wasn't like Sunoo. Ni-ki closed the door behind him with his foot and guided Sunoo back to the bed. They sat down together but Sunoo kept his face hidden in Ni-ki's shoulder.

"Sunoo...can you talk to me?" He asked gently. Sunoo shook his head.

"You don't want to talk about it?"

Sunoo shook his head again, clinging tightly to Ni-ki's shirt. He was embarrassed to be doing this, but he really needed Ni-ki's comfort right now.

"No...let's just stay like this for a minute." Sunoo whispers. His voice sounded horrible. Just by the sound of it, Ni-ki knew he had been crying. Ni-ki wanted to know the reason why, he was ready to fix the problem if possible. But, there was nothing he could do if Sunoo didn't want to talk, and he didn't want to force him.

So instead, Ni-ki wrapped his arms around Sunoo and pulled him closer. It only took a few seconds before Sunoo started shaking, crying silently. Ni-ki didn't force Sunoo to look at him, but he reached his hand down and felt Sunoo's face, wiping some of the tears off of his cheeks.

He held Sunoo tightly, afraid that if he let go, Sunoo would shatter into a million pieces. Whatever had happened, Ni-ki swore to himself that he wouldn't let it happen again.

"It's okay." Ni-ki whispers, "You're going to be fine, I'll make sure of it."

A/N: Yeah....so anyway~

Don't forget to vote if you like this (and try not to hate me too much....💀)

Um...things will get better? At some point.... 😅🫢

Have a good day/night 🫶💛