Fix You ! Cegan

XXIII

A heavy silence fell over them at that moment, and lingered well longer than it should have. Negan finally turned around to look at him, expectantly.

"Well?" He asked, an eyebrow raised.

Carl still said nothing, but Negan knew the look in his eye very well and tensed expectantly. He knew immediately that he had pushed the kid too far. Suddenly in one swift move Carl crossed the room to Negan, and his hand had deftly landed In Negans pocket where he somehow must have memorized where he always kept a pocket knife, and Carl pulled it out before Negan even knew what was going on. Negan would have been extremely impressed had it been in other circumstances. But now he found his own knife to his throat.

"Take it back." Carl gritted out.

"I- What?" Negan asked him, dazed. He hadn't exactly been expecting Carl to declare his undying love for him, but he also hadn't expected this.

"Take it back. This- this isn't how it's supposed to be. Do not do this to me again. I spent long enough being fucked up over you. I'm not- I can't go back. No."

"Carl...I'm telling you that you can stop running, okay? It doesn't have to be like this anymore..."

"No. You don't get to do this. Like you said, I don't want to be fixed. And certainly not by you. You know why I'm here, so stop complicating it. You don't give a shit about me, you're using me. Which is how I want it to be." Neither of them were sure who the last part was aimed at. It may have been Carl trying to convince himself. Regardless, Carl pulled the knife down and handed it back to Negan.

A quiet came over them, and Negan nodded resolutely, and turned around to pour another shot. But Carl was sure that it couldn't be that easy, and stood there, wondering what- if any backlash was about to come. Negans words were still floating around in his head, but he didn't even know where to start in processing them. What bullshit. How dare Negan unpack all that on him and expect him to believe it?

"Well alright, Carl," Negan started, leaning back against the bar and looking Carl over as if it was the first time he'd seen him.

"You know what you're asking, right? You really want to go tit for tat with me? Fair trade."

"I...yes? We've gone over this."

"Have we though?" Negan started to walk towards him like he on the prowl. "Have we really? Do you know what you're really asking for? Absolutely sure?" He asked again, with his head cocked to the side. Carl was absolutely not sure, but he knew he wasn't about to back down.

He swallowed hard. "Won't really be different than what we were already doing, 'cept we take feelings out and I actually have something to show for the time I put up with you. Again, you're complicating things."

A half-smirk spread across Negans face, but it had a dangerous air. Carl knew he was on thin ice.

"You're in for a rude awakening kid." Negan said simply. "Especially if you think this will be anything like it was before."

"What, you think I can't take anything you throw at me?" Carl mustered up the last little bit of bravery he had left in him. It wasn't much.

"No, I know for a fact that you can't. You have no idea what I'm capable of Carl." Negan was close to him now- too close.

"Yeah, I do. You're such a dick." Carl whispered out.

"Well excuse me, young sir. I'm pretty sure that I, not only five minutes ago, quite eloquently professed some rather strong feelings to your ungrateful ass, only to have them unrequited, so I think that makes you the dick. But since I'm such a nice, fuckin' guy, I'm trying to work with you here. And since I'm such a nice fuckin' guy I'm going to take into consideration that you, young man, may not know exactly what he's getting himself into, and so I'm going to give you a little trial run on what it's like to earn your keep with me. Sound okay with you?" Negan grabbed his chin at the end for good measure.