Random story ideas with almost no plot & writing help

Funny dialogue bc why not UwU

Person 1
Person 2

- "Could you at least try to be nice?"
"Your still breathing. This is me being fucking nice, asshole."

- "did you just fall?"
"No, I attacked the floor."
"Backwards?"
"Im freaking talented."

- "where did you come from?"
"Ooh. Interesting question. I was born in Brazil, then I spent the first thirteen years of my life in France, but I went to highschool in Germany, then college in America, and that's where I live now. But of course, neither of my parents are from any of those places-"
"You fucking know that's not what I mean- how did you get through my window?"

- "your a psychopath."
"I prefer creative."

- "your insane."
"I know! Isn't it great?"

- "right now I don't know if I should kiss you or shove you off a bridge."
"..can I pick?"

- "if someone gets nosy, you can just uhh.. ya know. Shoot 'em."
"Shoot them?!"
"Politely"

-"you know your my favorite, right?"
"I better be."

- "your amazing."
"I know."

- "your amazing."
"Your not to bad yourself, (pet name)."

- "your crushing my femur."
"You don't even know where your femur is."

- "what is this, the third time I'm crashing my own funeral?"
"Fifth."
"Really? That many?"

- "hey, I didn't kill anyone today!"
"What do you want, a gold star?"

- "hold on, you DIED."
"Yeah, well, it didn't stick."