Black

III // To Snog or NOT to Snog

Thursday

September 3, 1977

Gryffindor Common Room
(Edit: and the Great Hall, sadly)

I've given up on counting the amount of times that Black touches his hair. It'd be a week from now and I'd be up to a thousand, and really, who wants to waste parchment on numbers.

Lily and Lottie are at breakfast, and I'm attempting to hide out in the common room. However, if Black decides to come in here I'm screwed.

So I woke up early, as usual, and went to go get breakfast and what do I see? Black and Dorcas eating, next to each other. This is obviously problematic as where would I eat, besides next to Dorcas?

He's ruining my friendships, and ruining my food!

Does she know he's the one that spilled mucus all over her? Huh? Does she? I could always just, well, send her a note.

Good thinking Eva.

I'm going to starve to death.

In the long run, thirty galleons isn't even that much money!

Actually, well, according to muggle studies, it would be about 150 pounds, 340 Australian dollars or 300 American dollars, which, in the muggle world, is probably a lot.

I would like fifteen galleons now that I think about it.

Actually, that would involve getting closer than a foot to Black, which in the long run, is probably not a good idea. He probably smells really bad.

I think I need to visit a mental hospital.

Ahh, speaking of mental instability, here comes Lily!

"What on earth are you doing?" She hissed, attempting to squeeze her way into the crevice I had forced myself into. "I had to put up with not only the marauders, but Potter and Black's fifth year female stalkers (fifthies). Not good."

I rolled my eyes. "So dramatic."

"Well I'm not the one who's hiding," Lily sputtered. "Lottie's stuck there, trying to detain the bloody prat quadruplet (triplet, in my opinion) while I've been hunting for you. Get out of your crevice and come eat!"

My eyes widened; Lily must have been around Potter for over half an hour if she was this frazzled, but, well, I couldn't very well just go could I? "Uh, no, sorry Lil, I have, well, things to do, places to be, that sort of thing, you know."

"You're not still worried about the whole snogging thing are you?" Lily questioned. "I've forgiven you for that anyway. And, if you think about it, Black will have probably managed to escape Lottie's clutches by now and won't be there when we get to the great hall."

"You make an interesting point." But not good enough to get me down there.

Lily sighed. "I hate to have to resort to this, but if you don't come, I will be forced to tell a certain someone about a certain thing that you wouldn't really want anyone to know about."

Despite Lily's ridiculously uninformative threat, I actually understood the basis of it, and was either referring to the fact that once I stole Black's underwear and transfigured it into a piece of clay that looked and (after some tricky charm work) smelled like apple pie, which he ate, or the fact that I have designed every aspect of Remus' and my wedding (it's going to be in the Autumn), which, realistically, would cause damage through whoever she told.

I narrowed my eyes. "You wouldn't."

"Whatever you think I mean, I would," she laughed.

"But how on earth can you know what I'm thinking of? There's multiple options." She wouldn't be able to get out of this one.