I'm fashionably late to loving myself

come back home

I know I make you reminisce about the days you so wish to live again,
The childhood, the home, the only place where one belonged,
Old memories so worn, simple joys forlorn,
Abandoned and covered with dust of desperation.

I once longed that I see the world from those lenses,
Is it really shiny and polished, where a rugged me wouldn't fit?
Maybe we'd all be happy if I sacrificed a little,
A little of my joys, a little of my hopes, a little of my truth,
And I could buy happiness for us all.

Pretty sure that's what they all started with,
A few more years of pain till I can trade them for happiness,
Some of us covered our plain truths and coated them with the illusion of self determination.
How could one decide for someone they've forsaken?

Well I've come to say that I can no longer stand it.
I've come to take back my toys, I have nothing more to sacrifice.
I've seen your happiness, I've seen your glory, your hard earned lux and your accentuated stories.
It still lacks what drives me, and what drives me is not a crowd of the lost,
Forsaken their truth and what guides them to love.

Yes, I love the family; not only need it, but it's still just a meeting of people who've lost their souls,
Who upon depravity of their joy will scrape off at another's.
So, I long not for your world anymore, I've been defeated,
I don't want a trade of lives, one of a miser with more misery to sow.
I'm okay with my own, where I know what I'll do, and I'll do what I know.