My Life With Mental Illnesses TRIGGER WARNING

How it started

My ADHD first got diagnosed when I was 5 the only thing I remember from them was that the testing I was given in school had my initials. I've had hyperactivity for as long as I can remember. 

My bipolar depression first reared its ugly head in 2015 after I Had turned 15 this has a trigger warning (cheating). My dad was getting ready for work and I woke up to his alarm I went downstairs in time to tell him the same thing we told him every morning "Have a good day at work. Don't die or I'll kill you." I know, dark. I have no idea how it started. He had closed the door behind him and my sister started bawling on the couch (she rarely cries trust me) so I asked her what was wrong. Her response was to pass me her phone. For context, this was my dads' old phone. What I saw next caused the depression to show itself. She had been receiving texts between my dad and his girlfriend (He was still married to my mom at the time.) I mean all of them. Well turns out my dad forgot his wallet and he had to come back inside to get it. At this point, I was pissed and sad and disappointed. So I confronted him. I said holding the phone in his face, "What the fuck is this?" He decided that he HAD to go to work and said "I'm so sorry I will tell your mom as soon as I get home." Well, he didn't. My sister and I held onto it for a week before we decided that we were going to have to break our mom's heart. Later that day after we told her they got into a fight and we could hear it from upstairs. I remember walking to the top of the steps and being so angry I punched a hole in the wall. When I walked downstairs I was scared of myself because I didn't feel anything. After that feeling, I just felt hollow and empty. That's the start of my depression. 

The start of my anxiety began soon after my depression. There's not much else I can say about that.

For the start of my PTSD, I will start with one of the few memories I have from my childhood MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING emotional, and verbal abuse.  When I was around 8 my dad told me to clean my room and I started to but kept getting distracted. Well, he really didn't like it so he decided it was a good idea to pour out a 66-quart bin of small toys. Then he wanted me to clean up the mess he made so I began to bawl my eyes out. His amazing idea was to take a picture of me in my 'pigsty' and then threaten to post it to my school's website so "everyone can see what a fat pig bitch" I was. And Im quoting him. I still hate hearing people call anything a 'pigsty'.