Saving Me (ongoing)

Volume 4

                       Celeste POV

And here I was, waiting for Clara to show up for our...whatever you want to call it. This morning was definitely something.

Few hours earlier

Waking up to the sound of my alarm was killing me. I was so tired and for some reason my bed was feeling so comfortable which was making it hard. After laying in bed contemplating if I actually want to go or if it was my bed talking, I get up to go to the bathroom. Coming to the realization after using the washroom that I got my period I seemed to be extra crabby. Of course my body decides to throw a blood tantrum the day I actually have to go somewhere. Still deciding against staying home I prepare my shower and my clothes. I decided on a sweater which I was going to revolve my outfit around. It was black with grey writing on the back that read "doing great things". After looking in my drawers and not finding a bottom that I liked I finally decided on going to my closet. Going through my clothes I found the perfect thing, a skirt, it was a mid thigh skirt that was black.  Usually I would just go in hoodies in sweats not really caring but for some reason I felt I had to hide my depression when around Clara, and that's exactly what I did.

Getting in the shower after deciding my outfit, I just washed my hair and cleaned my body after. Call me weird but washing my hair first is better then washing my body first. Curly hair is not for the weak. Once I was done I dried off and put on a pj set for doing my hair. I refuse to mess up an outfit with hair products or just dead hair falling. Trying to decide which hairstyle I wanted, I decided one something simple, an Afro. After doing my hair I put on my outfit and went to see which shoes I would be wearing. Deciding on my air max and calling it a day. I am about to leave out when realizing it's already 1:50 PM. So after getting my natures course, taking forever to find an outfit, and having to do my hair I made it out.

With the ice cream shop being close by it didn't take that long to get there. Realizing I'm the first to get there, I just sit down and start observing my surroundings. There's an old couple sitting across from each other and a family sitting in a booth. Looking down, I wonder what it would've been like for me and my mom if I wasn't so stuck up on a person. Thinking of how she is probably living her life freely right now with no after thought of how her actions would affect other people. Other people like me. Loving too hard will always have it cons. After overthinking everything I see someone come and get into the chair across from me. "Hey you look great" I hear Clara say. Looking up and smiling at her compliment I go on to say that same thing to not seem rude. I would hate to come off as rude right now. "You as well". She giving a tight lip smile and nods her head. "How are you doing today " I spoke trying to have a conversation where she talking and I listen. Asking questions will always give people the opportunity to talk about themselves so I don't have to. " I'm doing good actually, before I got here I was doing some work on my laptop" she says with a soft expression. " how are you?" She asked. Putting my hand under the table and fidgeting with my fingers . "I'm doing fine" I say. She looks at me for a moment as if she's trying to figure me out and with this action I get a bit uncomfortable.

What if she already notices how sad I am. What if she doesn't like me. What if she thinks I stink or something. What if, what if, what if.

Overthinking the situation I put my head down to not look at her face and see her facial expressions. "Do you want to get some ice cream now" she says. Looking up and realizing I was being a little dramatic I smile a bit and nod thanking her in my head for not doing anything. We both get up and walk towards the cashier to order. Looking at the menu I see my favorite, cookies & cream. Looking next to me at Clara, I try to see which I've cream she wants by gently tapping her shoulder. "Which one do you want?" I ask while looking up to her. She so tall.
" strawberry will do" she says. "I want cookies & cream please" she looks at me "also you're ordering" I say. She's nod her head and says of course. Ringing the bell to get the cashier we wait. When the cashier comes around I see her name is Chloe. " Hi how can I help you today" she's say's excited as she looks up at Clara. Clara order "can I get two cones,one strawberry and one cookies & cream" she orders perfectly while handing over her card. The cashier takes the card and smiles. "Just give me one second" Chloe says and walks away. After a minute she comes back with a two cones with napkins and wishes us a good day. We smile and walk away to our seats. Sitting down and trying to make sure my ice cream doesn't spill, I start eating it. I see Clara take some of her and I ask "do you like it?" She nods her head while saying yes. Nodding my head in satisfaction I continue to eat my ice cream. " what do you like to do?" she ask. "Um sleep" I say honestly while still eating my ice cream "you?" I ask. She looks up before answering like she's thinking " I would say I like to work if I'm being honest" A little confused on why she likes to work I just nod my head. To each their own I guess.

After talking some more and eating ice cream we finally decide to go our separate ways. Leaving out of the ice cream shop I check my phone to see it's 3:30. An hour and 30 minutes is not too bad. Going to my car to go home I get in and drive off. Getting in my apartment and finally being able to take my shoes off and just rest without talking. That wasn't that hard, I thought it would be way worse but it wasn't so bad.

Going into my room I put back on my pj set and go to watch "Criminal Minds". Hearing my phone ring with a text I look and realize it's from Clara. "Hope you made it home ok, I'll see you tomorrow" she texts. After liking her message and telling her to have a safe night I finish watching my show. Hours later I hear my stomach growl and decide to make me something to eat. Looking in my freezer I see burger patties. Deciding to cook one of those I prepare my seasonings and begin cooking. Once I'm done I eat prepare myself for bed in the bathroom and go to get lie down. Today has been such a busy day and I'm just exhausted, spreading out on my bed I look up at the ceiling. Being to exhausted to think I go to sleep.

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School has just started back so sorry I was busy