Clara stood in the mirror as she tried not to cry, she slipped her black dress on and zipped it up as much as she could, trying to do it fully but groaning in frustration when she couldn't. she bit her bottom lip tightly, shakily breathing, her brothers funeral, something she wished she would never have even lived for. Sully walked into the bathroom behind her, in his black suit as he gently grabbed the zipper and pulled it up to the top. he sighed and flashed her a small smile in the mirror, leaning down to kiss her shoulder.
"you look beautiful baby." he whispered before brushing his hand across her waist and walking out of the bathroom to let her be alone for a little bit. she sniffled and pulled her hair to the front, wiping her eyes a little but careful not to smudge her mascara. she took one deep breath before walking out of the bathroom as well and making her way outside the house to get into the car. she had to be honest, she had always thought she would be going to Tristian's funeral first, but she had got it wrong, it had to be Jay first. she slipped into the passengers side of the car, quietly putting her seatbelt on and clearing her throat as she pulled the thing down from the top to sort her make up out.
she could feel sully's eyes on her, they were sad eyes and she knew she couldn't look at them or she would burst out crying. she stared at herself in the mirror before shutting it and pushing the thing back up. she rested her head back on the seat and adjusted herself slightly before the car finally started up. it had been around two weeks since she had been told the news, and she hadn't stopped crying, she hadn't talked to Tristian since and even though she was being selfish, she couldn't bring herself to look at him or hear his voice, the two boys were too alike.
Come to think of it, today was the first time she was going to see her eldest brother since he had been thrown into prison. she bit her lip harder at the thought, trying to take it all in at once was hard, and everything felt like it was going so fast. she was so grateful for Sully, he had been here for her the whole time, not to mention he had paid for the entire funeral, that's why it had come along so fast. she was also incredibly grateful for Dris, he had also been there for her at all times, she had even met Erin for the first time and she had to admit, she was the cutest, and a great distraction. there was also Dushane who had been there, just not as much as the other two, but in a way, she knew he was grieving too, more than the other boys.
she had recently found out her brother had been really close with Dushane always, Dushane said he saw the boy like his own little brother he needed to take care of, so she understood that two grieving people weren't exactly the best match to cheer each other up. The church where the service was being held wasn't too far away so it wasn't long until they pulled up to the place. she pushed the car door open and stepped out, waiting for sully before she walked into the church, seeing many people there, a lot crying their eyes out. she thanked a few of them for coming before her eyes landed on her eldest brother, two police men stood beside him. he looked good. he was in a suit but still had handcuffs on. she sniffled a little and walked up to him, looking one of the officers dead in the eyes.
"take them off, now." she said sternly, and they didn't even bother to try and tell a grieving family member no. they took the handcuffs off him and she shooed them away before hugging her brother tightly and feeling her eyes water. he hugged her back, tighter and sniffled, he hadn't hugged her in years, and the fact that it was under circumstances of their dead brother really wasn't the best.
"I'm so sorry Clara, he's was my baby brother and i should have protected him." he whispered and she immediately pulled away, staring him in the eyes with a confused look on her face, some what anger in her eyes but mostly just sadness taking over. she squinted and put her head back before pushing him hard.
"the fuck you mean was?! he still is your baby brother Tristian, just because he's dead doesn't mean he's not our brother anymore." she scowled and he put his head down in shame, she softened her face a little more, hugging him again, quicker this time.
"don't say some stupid shit like that when you're up there." she whispered and walked away from him as the service started, sitting at the front. she was going to be the first one to go up and say stuff, and she had a lot to say about him, she wanted everyone to know what an amazing person he was. and even though her voice and hands were shaky, she had to do this, she had to say her last few words whilst he was there in that casket. the priest was quick to finish what he was saying and she was also quick to stand up and walk to the stand.
she cleared her throat and looked down, feeling the tears already rolling down her cheeks as she wiped them away and sniffled.
"shit man, i don't even know where to start. Jay was different, he wasn't troubled or anything like that, he was funny, bubbly and it fucking always baffled me how he even ended up in prison. God, no one ever even knew him. no one knew Jay for who he actually was, half of you fucking sat in here probably couldn't tell me one word about jay, and you think you have the right to show up here and shed tears? and you fucking pigs over there, fuck you. couldn't have got there sooner, and maybe my brother would be alive." she took a deep breath as some people nodded their heads but her eyes mainly landed on sully's, who looked so proud as he nodded at her to keep going.
"yknow, jay was older than me, but even when people asked me about him, i would always call him my baby brother, because he had such a baby face and he was just so childish. he never ever failed to make me laugh, not even when my mum was out on a piss somewhere and i was crying, he would just wipe my tears and tell me it was going to be okay. and we always were. there were so many times now, where i wish i said more, i wish i did more for him, i wish he knew how much i love him, i wish i could have said it to him and-"
"you're saying it to him now. and he's listening." Dushane interrupted, putting his hand over his heart and slowly bowing his head in his respects. she smiled a little and nodded. she looked over at his casket and walked over, putting a hand over the top of it. she rested her head against it and whispered so only he could hear her.
"i love you baby brother." she kept repeating it until she felt a warm hand on her back, and heard a group of people crowing around his casket, all of them putting their hands on it to show their respect for him and her. she smiled a little, leaning into sully who now hand his arm loosely resting around her waist. he kissed her cheek.
"you did so well princess, im proud of you." he whispered and she nodded. she did good.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
bro mb its hella short, im so tired rn but you guys wanted this so i gave it to youuu
opinions? vote and comment.
happy readinggg
