Rollercoster

1.0

June 2023

Life has gotten crazy. After opening for Taylor Swift people started to listen to my music, which I am extremely thankful for. The crowds were crazy and the way Taylor interacted with them was nuts in itself. I grew up enjoying Taylor Swift, not necessarily a swiftie but after experiencing the crowds, and her kindness I can understand why she has such a cult-like following.

Touring was hard, it's always been hard for me. The inability to see your friends and family, the constant travel which takes away your energy to then go and put your all out there on the stage. It was nuts but I couldn't be more thankful for the experience.

I had my last show with her on May 28th and it was nuts. Since then I have just been lounging around my apartment, making plans with friends just to cancel on them a couple hours before they were supposed to happen. I have gone through with a couple of them but the ratio is probably 70/30 in favor of canceling plans. My hometown friends are worried but at the same time what can they really do?

I had just woken up, maybe it's 12:00, and maybe it's late but I can't seem to find a reason to get up any earlier. All my attempts at writing songs? Useless. Most of my friends? Internships. My dog? Now lives at my parents house because she couldn't come on tour with me. And yes, if I actually made plans, lived a little, stopped being a hobbit then yes, getting up would be easier, but sadly I don't have the motivation nor discipline.

It was 12:30 when I finished making myself breakfast. It's sad honestly, how it takes me 30 minutes to make cereal but what can I say? I'm a bit sad right now. I sat down and sort of stared at the wall for a couple of minutes, letting my mind wander to far off lands where I can get up at a reasonable hour, make plans with my friends and am not stuck in a horrible cycle of self-disappointment caused by you guessed it, me. By the time my mind came back to earth, my cereal was soggy. I can't even eat cereal right now.

I then made my way to my living room, turning on the TV watching whatever bad daytime T.V show was on. I quickly realized that it was in fact a weekday between the hours of 12:00-3:00pm and switched the channel to Pat McAfee's youtube and started watching the show. I, like many other fans, was disappointed when I heard the news of their move to ESPN but people have to grow and maybe this might end up being a good thing.