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Zenna's point of view of last night

My hair flew by the wind. I was trying not to cross the speed limit. But there was really no one else on the street. So occasionally I sped up, I think. There was toll naka, I went in the motorcycle section, carefully, making sure not hit any of the things.
'Tham!', a policewala stopped me
'License dakhav', he said
I reached for my purse, and showed him whatever came in my hand.
He called for a female police officer
'Khali utar', she told me
'Kay zhale?', I said Marathi
'Get down!', she said in Hindi. Then she made me blow in something. Then she took me in, and put me in an empty jail cell.
She told me that drunk driving is a punishable offense. She told me to call my parents. I called Neha.
The inspector spoke something to Neha in Marathi, about me drunk driving, and it being a punishable offense over call.
Sometime later, Neha came to pick me up.
They took a fine of 2000 rupees and added Drunk Driving to my record. Then they let us go.

'What were you thinking?', Neha said
'...about you', I undoubtedly replied
'You're drunk', she said and handed me helmet from my bike.
I stood with the helmet in my hands, and watched as she wore her helmet.
'You saved me', I said
'What?'
'You saved my life!', I hugged her
'Okay, okay!', she said and slowly brushed me aside
I have disappointed her, I thought in my drunken state.
She took the helmet from my hands and put it on me. I looked at her.
'You're very pretty', I said
And she was infact very pretty.

I sat behind her, clutching her waist, on my scooty, which she drove, very carefully. Wind hit my face, and so did her hair, her hair was damp, and gently hit the sides of my face. Something about her was that she was very soft, and felt very delicate to hold, so much so that I almost felt bad, that I could hurt her, unknowingly. And I probably have now. And that makes me feel even terrible.
She stopped the scooter at the beach Chowpatty, and we got off.
Then she spoke to my mom and Shubham that she had found me and that I was okay. I sat on the beach and sipped coconut water. She was worried about me. And not just her but everyone else too.
After she was done talking on the phone, she came and sat next to me.
We sat in silence. The beer had worn off now, I was starting to become sober again. We sat at the beach and watched the ocean and the night sky. Stupid me couldn't even think of something to say, not that anything could make up for what I did. I should just apologize to her.
And out of all the people she had to come and find me, In this state!
I must have disappointed her soo much that I could die of embarrassment.
It was a nice atmosphere though. The moon was crescent, and a few stars twinkled, which you could only see if you really tried to., and the whole of sky was reflected in the black Arabian ocean in front of us. The air smelled salty and fresh. There was no one at the beach, but us. Nice and quiet. But none of it mattered because Neha was next to me, and she smelled soo good. She too smelled fresh and clean, like she had just washed her hair. She must be preparing to sleep, when she had to come and get me.
'I'm sorry', I said lowly
She was facing the ocean
'It's okay... are you feeling alright now?', she said in her ever soo soft voice
'I am fine', I said
'Alright then', she said and was quiet for some time.
'...'
But then she started again

'What the hell were you thinking, drinking like this, at this time!? And then driving. What if you had gotten into an accident!? And why weren't you replying to my texts or calls? You had me so worried! And you didn't even tell me where you were going. What if something had happened to you!? Your mom was calling me, and I had no idea where you were. Me and even Shubham was worried and-', she stopped midways
I was surprised by her outburst and then started tearing up, maybe it was because the drinking effects hadn't completely worn off yet, but mainly because I knew that I hurt her.
She opened her mouth again to speak, but stopped this time, and didn't say what seemed like she wanted to. She wrapped her hands around her legs.
And looked down. 'Were you with... him?', she asked very carefully
'With whom?', I cried, because I could no longer control my tears, it just flowed
'Raj', she said plainly and looked into my eyes hoping for an answer she didn't want
'I was... but', I knew stopping here wouldn't be right, 'But I... I am in love with you, Neha', I might have raised my voice, but it was necessary to get these words out of me
'I have always liked you, from the moment you walked into the washroom that day, I have loved you, always, and its only you who is special to me... In crowds, my eyes search only yours, it is only your company that I like...it is only you who makes me feel this way', my voice subsided then broke, and I couldn't finish what I was saying.
She softened under my gaze., then wiped my tears and hugged me close. The most comforting embrace.
'I sorry Neha, for making you worried like this and everything else, I didn't mean to- I will never do this again...', I said
Then it hit me, this could be the end of us. I confessed to her, and she hasn't said anything back. She could realize how my friendship bore selfish romantic intentions. I might have read all her signals wrong until now, and all these feelings could very well just be one sided, and right now she could be disgusted by me., and break all ties with me.
If not now then later.
She sighed and didn't meet my eyes.
Maybe backing off is the right thing to do, pretending like nothing happened so we can go back to being friends. So maybe I was selfish afterall, but truthfully I don't care, I just don't want to lose her.
'Neha, please forget whatever I just said... I-'
She held my face. At first, I did not understand what she was doing. But then she brought her face closer to mine and I realized that... she kissed me.
She kissed me on the lips, by her lips. For a good minute or so. In this moment, I should have closed my eyes, but I was soo surprised by her bold act, that I looked straight ahead, at the nothingness infront of me. My brain stopped working. Infact, I do not even know what happened.
The line "Oh, this can't be real", from a Girl In Red song immediately made sense.
After some time, she got away. I looked at her to make sense of what just happened but she panicked, I saw it in her eyes.
'I'm so-', she started
'...'
She got up, I got up too. Then she turned in the opposite direction, and started running, away from me. SHE STARTED RUNNING!? I ran behind her. But she was fast. How was she this fast, for someone soo short?
She looked blurry running on the beach, under the dark night sky. She hair swinging in opposite directions, as she moved. I couldn’t think a single thought. Only that I had to catch upto her, and the sand that shifted under my feet. I was seeing only her.
Eventually, I caught up to her. And pulled her into a hug. She buried her head in my chest, and I held her whole in my arms. I looked over her head, again at nothing., and again we stood in silence.
My feet were cold, but she was warm, and breathing, calm.
I thought, If there was a line between life and death., it would be this exact, precise moment.
The air smelled salty and cold, we were alone on the beach, under the moonlight. Just me, her and the stars.

The end.


Authors Note: Aggressively plays 'I wanna be your girlfriend' by Girl In Red 🎶

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