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𝗟𝗢𝗔𝗗𝗜𝗡𝗚↻ 𝗜𝗡𝗙𝗢𝗠𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 . . . —— Angel ——
(This chapter will contain sensitive topics and will revolve around suicide. *I would listen to a sad song to set the scene* you have been warned- read at your own risk)
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"my last breath was my happiest one"
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Her vision was blurry due to the overwhelming tears in her eyes as she stared at herself in the large bathroom mirror before her.
Her eyes, her smile, her nose, her body, her personality, everything. She hated it all. She hated herself.
The white vest top she wore showed off her extremely underweight body, yet she still felt like it wasn't enough. Her grey shorts showed off her thin legs which hurt after the long hours of practice.
She'd come home early so she can get more 'rest' she told the others, trying to prevent the tears and bubble in her throat from being exposed.
Though that wasn't a full lie, she was going home to 'rest' but it would be for a lot longer than just a few hours of sleep.
She blinked her frozen open eyes for the first time in a few minutes, reality hitting her once again.
The sound of the cold running bath water taking her out of her deep thoughts.
She looked at her sealed note which she left on the bathroom counter and let the hot tears stream down her face.
Her bottom lip quivered as she removed the hair from her face and bit down on her hand to silence her cries.
She turned to the grand white bathtub and allowed herself to submerge into the freezing water, causing a small gasp to escape her lips and make her legs slightly shake.
The tap still ran as the water filled up and made its way past her petite waist. She reached down on the floor and grabbed the cup of water along with the two small pills.
She took them without thinking twice and sat silently as her tears slowly and softly trickled down her face.
'Goodnight, I love you. I'll come to check on you once I finish practicing'
The last words Jeongin spoke to her rang through her head as she stared at the ceiling.
Again a shaky breath left her lips, it partly to do with the cold temperatures and it also to do with the heavy emotions weighing down on her.
The water now spewed over the bathtub making her shiver once more before gripping the sides of the bath and pulling herself under.
Her skin was the same colour as snow as her lips were the same shade as the ocean.
Goosebumps covered her slim arms and legs while her fingertips washed blue.
The small smile she wore before going under was now slowly disappearing and being replaced with a blank expression.
The knock at the bathroom door being silenced due to the pressure of the water.
The same wet liquid shortly running under the door and leading out to her bedroom, the place where Jeongin stood in confusion and disbelief.
"Rose, are you ok?" He called out from behind the door, not believing what his thoughts were desperately trying to tell him. "Rosie?"
"To my dearest members, I am so sorry I left you but I feel as though I can finally be truly happy and feel at ease with life. I didn't know love existed until i fell unexpectedly with my so called rival. I can't explain how much I will miss you guys and long for your soft touches. You're the family I could choose and the place I feel safest, my home is within your arms and the walls of our shared dorm.
I will finally be able to see straykids from a stays PoV, I will cheer for you guys and wish you the best in your careers from above. I believe I spent my life the way I wanted and if I got the chance to relive it, knowing that this would be the outcome and how my life would end.. I would still choose to relive it a thousands times.
I love you Jeongin and don't be afraid to live on and find another beautiful girl to spend the rest of your years with. I love all of you and I am forever grateful to Stay. - The best Maknae, Rose!"
-yngjwon (Tbh I think this chapter is cringe due to my writing skills but I am sorry if it is too much or offended anyone reading- good day/night)
If you know anyone who is feeling suicidal or having suicidal thoughts pls contact the suicide helpline to get them help and prevent a circumstance like this from happening. If you are feeling this way and don't know how to tell anyone, you are free to message me and open up about your feelings!
