Paradigm

Chapter XVI

Very intense chapter again ! TW : torture, homophobic slanders, major character death.

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Singapore Strait, March 1998.

The cruise boat's next stop was Kuala Lumpur. They would return to dry land in a few hours and with a little bit of luck, they would be able to take a plane by tomorrow. San had been uncomfortable since his dementia attack. Seonghwa did not dare broach the topic for fear of angering him or triggering another crisis.

The previous evening, he had calmed down by himself. In fact, he might even have fallen asleep in the shower if the editor had not picked him up from the floor. The author had teetered back to the bedroom, very weak. The poor guy was soaking wet, Seonghwa could not leave him like that. Him getting sick could have jeopardized their escape, so after asking for his permission, he had taken off his dripping trousers and shirt with some difficulty.

Even though he was not supposed to have inappropriate thoughts in such a critical moment, the editor could not help examining his body. The writer was quite noticeably thin, but that did not seem to stem from malnutrition of any kind. It was morphological. Besides, if he vomited so much on a fairly recurrent basis, it was hardly surprising.

Then, the young man's gaze dwelt on the huge rectangle scar on his delicate flank. The same as Bora's. It was not covered with plaster this time. His throat tightened as he imagined the atrocious pain that it testified to.

Snapping out of his trance, he had quickly pulled on his dry pajamas, keeping himself from blushing, and dragged Paul to his bed where he had collapsed, already asleep. Despite his own tiredness, he had swept up all the broken glass on the floor and scrubbed away every last speck of blood. A deposit of around a hundred dollars had been added to their budget because of the damage.

Focused on folding his clothes tightly enough to make them in his backpack, Seonghwa could not help but replay yesterday's events in his mind endlessly. His weird attraction for San had now turned into something even more unsettling ever since he had confided his distress and his inner troubles. Yeosang had always tried to warn him about the dangers of falling for men with problems and yet here he was, falling for one with really big problems.

-I'm really embarrassed about yesterday.

The editor had sensed San would say something like that. He had felt his lingering stare on his back for a few minutes prior.

-There's no need to. Everyone goes through bad moments.

He said nothing, clearly not convinced that his behavior could be excused.

-You must have a lot of questions. I mean, now that you've seen me without any clothes on.

The blood rushed to the young man's cheeks with disconcerting speed. Seonghwa's grasp tightened around a t-shirt, crumpling it. He was making a lot of efforts to not look in Paul's direction, unable to face his sharp gaze.

-This scar is indeed huge. But what's even more striking is that it's the same as the one on the naked woman in the polaroid I found in your suitcase. In the shape of a rectangle, it cannot be accidental.

-What does that tell you?

-I don't know. Is it a self-inflicted wound ?

-No.

-Did Bora... have violent behaviors towards you ?

-She did, in a certain way.

-Did Hongjoong have a hand in this ?