A Better Life

Before you close your eyes

"Macy?" I croak out, but almost gag at the iron taste of blood in my mouth.

"Ma-" I fall into a coughing fit, the taste of blood becoming more prominent now, making me want to throw up.

My entire body is in pain, and I can only hope that someone will call an ambulance, because moving seems nearly impossible for me at the moment.

After what feels like hours, I hear an ambulance siren and not long after I see paramedics – some rushing to the driver's side and some to my side.

"Hey, can you hear me?" One asks through my window.

"Yeah" I nod my head, but it makes the dizziness worse.

"Try not to move your head for me, okay? We're gonna get you out of there, just hang tight".

A few firefighters succeeded in getting me out of the car and placed me onto a stretcher, leaving the paramedics to tend to me.

"Hey, sweetheart. Can you tell me your name?"

"Uhm" I pause for a bit, the question not registering. My eyes feel heavy, and I just want to sleep, but now someone wants to ask me questions.

"Hey" I feel a fist roughly rubbing up and down my sternum, making me whine and open my eyes again. "Can you tell me your name?"

I struggle to think of an answer but finally answer "J-Jany".

"Okay, that's good... that's a beautiful name, I'm Reece. I'm just going to put this collar around your neck to keep you from moving your head and maybe causing damage. Just keep still for me and let me do all the work."

"Alright I'm going to lift you into the ambulance now so we can get you to the hospital as quick as possible. There are a few things that are concerning me." The paramedic says, getting me situated in the back of the ambulance.

"These just go on your chest so I can keep an eye on your heart rate and so forth and this goes on your finger".

"Where do you feel pain?" He asks me.

"Everywhere" I cry out, the tears now freely rolling down my cheeks.

"Alright, alright, shhhh. Are you allergic to anything?"

"Penicillin"

"Okay, I'm going to give you some morphine to eliminate some of the pain, just so it's a bit more bearable."

He rips open a packet with the syringe and attaches the needle to it, before searching the crook of my arm for a vein and wiping it with an alcohol wipe.

"Quick pinch and then you should start feeling a little less pain. We're almost there just a little while longer then you'll be in the best hands."

I think I'll just take a nap before we get there. Yeah, that sounds nice.

"Hey, keep talking to me, keep your eyes open".

Nope, I'm going to be disobedient for once in my life.

I can feel the ambulance coming to an abrupt stop. The doors are thrown open and we are moving at a very fast pace. I can hear some people talking but it's far away, they are mumbling some things about an accident or something like that.

"Hey Jany, sweetheart. Can you open your eyes for me?"

Everything sounds underwater and it feels like there is a rock sitting on my eyelids. My eyelids flutter, but I can't get them to just open. For the second time today, someone's fist is rubbing harshly on my sternum, making my eyes open on their own accord and a whine escaping me.

"There you go, thought you'd never open your eyes for us, sweetheart. I'm doctor Calum Hood, I'm just going to move around you and feel for pulses, okay? Just try taking deep breaths".

The doctor looks away from me and to someone else in the room. "Airway is intact, and all the pulses are 2+."

The doctor focuses his gaze back on me "Keep your eyes open for me, Jany. Do you know where you are?"

Only a whine escapes my mouth. When did I get so whiney and vulnerable?

"Do you know what year it is?"

Again, with another question. Can't they just let me sleep and stop pestering me to quench their curiosity?

"Okay, sweetheart, you're going to feel a sting on your left arm, it's just one of the other doctors, Luke, inserting an IV, just stay nice and relaxed." The doctor tells me, rubbing a comforting hand up and down my arm.

I feel something cold touching my chest, but I can't seem to do anything about it. "Can you turn your head to right for me, please?" Doctor Calum asks.

When I don't respond or do anything, he gently moves my head to the right, as much as is possible with the collar around my head.

"Deep breath in"

But my lungs feel heavy, like a boulder sitting on my chest.

"We've got a collapsed lung, decreased breath sounds. We need to insert a chest tube! Luke, feel for any spinal injuries and check her eyes for me".

"Okay Jany, you're going to feel some pressure. We have to remove the fluid from your lungs."

Luke uses his thumb to keep my eyelid open and flashes a light into my eyes. "Her pupils are dilating slow; she has a small concussion."

Then his hands move to my neck, pressing on the area almost roughly.

"Help me flip her onto her side".

Multiple hands touch my body and I feel myself turned onto my side. There is a hand pressing down my spine and then I feel the pressure underneath my ribs. Slight pressure my ass. I involuntarily reach out to grab onto the person's wrist.

"You're okay. You're being so brave. Almost done".

"She's clear of any spinal injuries" Luke says and a few seconds later I hear Calum "the chest tube is in".

They turn me back onto my back and Luke removes the collar.

Calum focuses on someone else in the room again "She has a GCS of 9".

"Alright sweetheart, everything is going to start calming down now. I'm going to feel down your body, for any more injuries, okay?"

I don't know why I can't talk or at least acknowledge anything he is saying to me.

Then his attention is back on the other people in the room as he presses on my collar bones.

"Clavicles are in good condition".

Then his hands palpate on my stomach.

"No abnormalities in the abdomen"

His hands press on both sides of my pelvis.

"Pelvis is stable"

He then moves onto my arms and legs.

"No breaks in the arms and legs. Her knee is dislocated though. Please page Doctor Clifford."