Vent

Goldcoast

It was the first Cheer Competition in Vegas,
They were some if the worst days of my life though somehow had some brightsides,
I feared for someone's safety as they drunkenly separated from us and went on their own
I feared they wouldn't arrive back at the hotel room,
Though at Blondie's that night, we got free ice cream from the waitress for being the most well behaved kids they have seen,
I don't remember much,
Only glimpses,
A party bus with a bag of white cheddar Cheeto puffs,
A dance party and sticking my head out of a window,
Doing cool tricks on a luminescent pole,
A bartender ferris wheel,
A bus built like an airplane,
The worst was yet to come,
Slight dread at the notice of a messed up group of pixels on my iPad,
The worst was yet to come,
One night,
At the GoldCoast Hotel Bowling Alley,
I don't remember much,
My dad and Brian got into a fight,
I was terrified,
My mom was smoking,
I was terrified,
I don't remember much,
Only glimpses,
But glimpses are enough,
Enough to pick up my heart rate at bowling alleys,
Enough for derealization to kick the second I step inside one,
Alone with a bunch of kids I hardly know with no supervision,
While the parents drink somewhere unknown to us,
As my anxiety builds on not knowing how the night will end,
Not knowing when we will finally be able to go back to the safety and comfort of the hotel room,
The smell of cigarettes lace the air,
Overstimulation swoops in like a hawk on its prey,
I am powerless against the sounds, smells, bright lights, and fear that attack me from all sides,
Nothing I can do because I am alone,
The parents nowhere to be found,
No one to guide me back to the safety and simpleness of the hotel room,
Because I can not leave without them,
I am not safe anywhere here,
There are intoxicated people in every direction,
The walls are closing in,
And no one cares,
Because they only care about their own fun,
Unaware of how it affects the children who have to fret over their own safety in the hands of people who can't walk straight,
let alone think