fade into you |jordan li|

ten. regrets

  "You killed all of your friends?" Cate was shocked, but at the same time confused, just like Marie.

  Jordan stayed silent, knowing that it was for the best. They still felt guilty for what happened that night.

  "I was drunk, coming home from a party, And I had no control over myself. I caved the car in from the inside out, killing everyone but me. And I would have died. If it wasn't for my brother. Ever since then I haven't had full control over my powers, at least not completely."

   "Shit. Was it your first time drunk?"

   "No. I drank a lot, actually. That's probably what started it all. I had a super high tolerance, I mean I still do, but I completely passed it that night. It was after a stupid argument with my dad and-."

"I killed my grandpa with my powers." Jordan lied, to, in their own strange way lighten things up, and disrupt the last word of her sentence.

"No you didn't." Cate looked at them weirdly.

"Yea I know. I was just feeling left out." They said, making everyone laugh. Marie really needed it, but so did Ari and Cate.

  Ari couldn't blame them for not wanting the secret out.

"Hey guys. I fucked up." Andre walked over to them with a panicked look on his face. His face was pale, like he had seen a ghost.

"What did you do?" Cate asked, worried by his expression.

"It's about her roommate." He motioned towards Marie.

"Emma?" Marie was concerned.

"Who the fuck is Emma?" Jordan asked, not receiving an answer from anyone but Ari, with a whisper only they could hear. "Little cricket? The YouTuber? She's Marie's roommate."

"I-is she okay?" Marie managed to get out, despite the immense fear she felt for her roommate.

"I think she's stuck." He admitted truthfully.

"What the fuck did you do Andre?" Ari was panicked, knowing he did something to mess everything up.

"Stuck? Where?" Marie questioned, wanting him to say what happened already.

"You know where." He told Cate.

"Andre. You promised." Her face dropped.

"Well it looks like he broke it." Jordan added.

"Thanks Jordan, for pointing out the obvious, that was really necessary." Ari playfully hit them on the shoulder.

                                  ✯★⁂★✯

   They were all outside now, after taking the time to change out of their formal wear, and into warmer clothes.

    "I found the tracker!" Marie shouted aloud so everyone could hear her. "There's blood on it."

  "Maybe this is good. She got out of the hell hole."Andre said to the group.

   "It looks like a meteor crashed here."

   "Maybe Sam can jump like Maeve does. He landed here with Emma and then jumped again." Andre suggested, trying to give them any hope he could.

  "Are you an idiot?" Ari looked at her Andre, and saw nothing, he had changed a lot..

"You don't have to be a bitch Ari I'm trying to find Marie's friend."

"We wouldn't have to find her in the first place if you didn't send her down there."

"She's right. What were you thinking?" Marie interrupted them.

"I had to do something." Andre tried to stand up for himself after getting backlash from the others.

"Yea, but... you didn't do anything. And of all people, you went to Emma?" She was upset, her roommate was already beginning to become her best friend.

Just then everyone's phone buzzed.

"What is it?" Marie asked, looking over his shoulder.

"New rankings are out. Andre's number one. You're two. Ari's three, and I'm still five. Wow. Congrats." Jordan stared at their phone, extremely dissatisfied with the results.

"Rankings? Really? We've got bigger fucking problems." Andre hissed, as if he had anything to complain about.

"Says number one. But you're right we do. Turns out the school has a fucking mengele health clinic. We don't know know who's in on it. If... if Brink was, maybe other professors, maybe Dean Shetty. But you guys are gonna get a green van and a talking dog and fucking solve it? You're just gonna end up like that fucking cricket."

   "Jordan! What the fuck?" Ari stared at them, it was true, but awful to say in the moment.

"Emma. The lost girl who's in deep shit? Her name is Emma." Marie corrected them. After all, She had a name.

"Jordan's right." Cate sided with them.

"Fucking thank you." They walked off, with Ari close behind them.

"Whereever Emma is it's not here." Cate said.

"Cate come on." Andre held on to her, not wanting her to leave.

"I told you not to do anything stupid. Why don't you ever fucking listen to..." Cate took a deep breath in. "This girl could be dead, Andre. We are in over our heads." She walked off, several yards behind Jordan and Ari.

"Walk me to my dorm?" Ari asked them, in spite of the voice in her head telling her that they were mad at her for her comment.

"Yea. Let's go." They walked slower so she could keep up with their pace.

"Maybe our relationship will help your rank tomorrow." She tried looking on the bright side.

   "What relationship? This isn't a thing." They spit out.

   "You know I didn't mean it like that. I meant our fake one." She looked sad. It took so long to even get to a place where she could talk to them, and now that she was in it they were being an asshole again.

    "Yea whatever. I bet you're happy."

    "Happy that my rank is higher than yours? Right. Because I definitely care about the rankings." She said with sarcastic tones.

   "You don't have to. You already have your dad to secure your spot. I have no one left."

   "Jordan. You have me. I mean when has my dad ever really been there for me? You know the truth."

   "I didn't ask to be there." They looked down at the ground, mentioning the car crash.

    "But you were! And I still blame you for it."

"I put you in that car because you needed to get home somehow, and Andre wasn't going to leave the party. You keep telling people Andre saved you, but when are you going to tell the truth? No one ever tells the truth about me."

"You only saved my ass because you felt guilty! You put me in that situation in the first place."

"And if I could take it back I would. But I can't."

"Well if I could take back sleeping with you I would, but I definitely can't."

They reached her room now, as she shut the door in their face.

  She was hoping for a knock on the door, for them to tell her they were sorry, for them to makeup, and for them to stay. And they  contemplated it for a while, but in the end they couldn't find the courage to knock. So they left her alone.