Chasing Rainbows

7: Love

Chapter Seven

"Are you really planning to make that man yours?" Zayn's question pierced the silence, as unexpected as a comet in the night sky. Pareho kaming nasa rooftop ngayon. I came here to breathe some air habang hinihintay na matapos ang pang i-interview nila kay Richard na ngayon ay nasa X room kasama ang aming Chief. Hindi ko alam kung anong ginagawa niya rito pero nadatnan ko lang siyang nakatulala pagkaakyat ko.

"Why the sudden curiosity?" I countered, my voice laced with bemusement. "Nagsisimula ka na bang kaibiganin kami?" I teased. 

Zayn doesn't usually ask personal questions like this. Hindi rin niya kami tinatanong kapag nagkukuwentuhan kami sa harapan niya ng mga pangyayari sa aming buhay. I don't even know if nakikinig ba siya kasi lagi siyang may sariling mundo kahit pa magkakasama kami.

He disregarded my question and posed another one. "What do you like about him?" 

I shrugged, nonchalantly. "I just like him."

He clicked his tongue, a sound of skepticism. "Is that even a valid reason to date him?"

"I never said na jojowain ko siya. Having a crush on him is enough. That way, I don't have to look for reasons to dislike him."

Confusion was evident on his face when I looked at him. "When you merely have a crush on someone, you only see the things you like about them because your knowledge of them is merely a silhouette. But love demands a deeper understanding. As you peel back the layers, you might uncover things that clash your taste. Thus, in the end, you might regret desiring more," I explained.

Masyado ring komplikadong bumuo ng relationship sa katulad niya dahil baka mas lalo lang siyang maguluhan kung ano nga ba siya. Even if he's attracted to me or if we manage to build a relationship, there's a high possibility that it will soon break if he becomes unstable.

"Are you sure you won't fall for him, though? The heart is a rebellious creature, not easily tamed."

"Then I will just break it myself," I declared defiantly.

A soft chuckle escaped his lips, a rare sound that echoed in the silence. I looked at him in disbelief. "Did you just laugh?"

When he realized what he had done, bigla siyang nagsungit. I rolled my eyes. "Ang pangit mo na," I retorted.

His question, however, lingered in the recesses of my mind. My heart was my own, yet it often beat to a rhythm contrary to my desires. Alam kong hindi malabo na dumating iyong araw na mas mapapalalim pa itong nararamdaman ko lalo na't nagiging malapit na kami sa isa't isa kaya naman mananatili akong tahimik para ako na mismo ang babasag nito balang araw.

***

"Hey." Aerika's nudge brought me back from the sea of my thoughts. "Are you okay?" she asked. I nodded but remained silent. I was watching the kids na naglalaro sa labas at hindi ko namalayan na kung saang lupalop na pala nakarating ang utak ko.

I tried to push Richard's words out of my mind, but they kept resurfacing. He had explained everything they did to Sofia, and each word hit me like a bullet. I was beyond disgusted with them. Heaven knows how much I wanted to cut his penis little by little, but the only thing I was allowed to do is to kick his balls.

He is alive and currently locked up in our underground jail. He will spend the rest of his days there until he dies. We aren't allowed to torture our enemies. We let their own minds become their tormentors.