Behind the Mask

Yellow Suited Bald Guys

Saitama stared at the giant monster ransacking the city, Genos standing behind him. "Sensei, do you really think you will be able to defeat it?"  "Probably." He said as he stretched before jumping into the air. Trihexa on the other hand, did not feel good at all. Suddenly, a bright green face burst out of the beast's chest. Trihexa stared down and screamed in terror and pain as Y/N ripped his way out of the beast.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!" Y/N shouted as he jumped out of the demon's chest. Landing on the ground, he turned to Union with a disturbing grin. "So, who's next?" He asked as the students and staff stared in horror as Trihexa's blood dripped down his face. The heroes tensed as he reached into his coat, before pulling out a boater hat and a bamboo cane. Union staff and students watched in confusion as the man chorus lined away after being devoured only minutes before.

 "Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my ragtime gal. Send me a kiss by wire, honey my heart's on fire." He said as spun around a lamppost.

"If you refuse me, honey, you'll lose me, then you'll be left alone. Oh baby, telephone and tell me I'm your own. You were a horrible crowd! Goodnight!" Trihexa watched the menace get pulled off screen by a shepherd's crook when suddenly "Consecutive Normal Punch."

Trihexa's head exploded as Saitama punched that bitch in the mouth. He reappeared beside Genos as he wiped some gunk off of his shirt. "So you wanna get some French fries?" "Yes, sensei." They turned around only to come face to face with the headmasters of Union. "You must be the Caped Baldy the Tornado told us about." "Uh, yeah." "We would like to thank you for your assistance." Ozpin said. "If you don't mind, we were wondering if you would consider traini-" "Twenty words or less. And one student is more than enough." Saitama said as he sped away. "So does anyone know where that green guy went?"

At WcDonalds, Saitama and Genos sat in a booth contemplating their next move. "So who's paying." Saitama asked as he checked his coupons. "Sensei, I spent the last of my money on groceries." "Damn." Unbeknownst to them, Y/N was standing outside. Slowly, he peeled off the mask, once again turning to wood in his hand. He stared silently at the mask in his hand. "Holy shit." He said as he looked at it. Slowly, he placed it into his bag before walking inside of the building. Once inside, he saw two men arguing over a pile of coupons.

"Hey, aren't you the guy who took down Trihexa?" "Technically yes." The man said as he shuffled his coupons. "How about I buy you dinner. It's the least I can do for sticking it to Union like that." the bald man looked at him. "You think I stopped it?" "Well it was either you or the other bald guy in a yellow suit." The hero shrugged. "Okay."

He handed a wad of cash to the blonde who stood up and walked to the counter. "You mind if I take a seat?" "No." The bald guy said as he pocketed a handful of seasoning packets. "You actually think I stopped that thing?" "Union overestimates itself like ninety five percent of the time. They claim to be the protectors of the world but we have incidents like this almost biweekly. If they were good at their jobs, it would happen once, maybe twice a season."

"My name is Y/N." "I'm Saitama." He said as the blonde took a seat at the table next to the man. "This is Genos." Genos nodded as he placed a tray of fries down in front of them. "So what is your problem with Union?" Saitama asked, wanting to get this conversation over. "I was going into the business course there, but due to a filing error, I was put in the hero course." Saitama nodded. "I don't have powers so I was immediately made the scapegoat." Genos grunted as he poured some ketchup onto the side of his plate. "I'm gonna go get a soda, either of you want anything?" "No thanks." Saitama said as he ate a fry.

Y/N walked over to the soda machine, filled up his cup with a blast of each soda before returning to the table. There he saw one of the last things he wanted to see. Talking to Saitama, was Emily. Saitama saw him and immediately pointed at him. "Shit." He said as he immediately turned around only to watch the ORC enter the restaurant. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." He said as he made a sharp left turn towards the bathroom. "Y/N, wait!" He heard Emily call as he rushed into the restroom. 

Looking for his phone, he remembered he left it at the table. "Shit." He said to himself as he heard pounding on the door. "I know you're in there, retard." He heard Issei shout as he slammed against the door. Y/N looked for a way out, only to remember the mask. Reaching into his bag, he pulled it out before staring at the toilet, then back at the mask. "Oh fuck me."

"DRAGON SHOT!" Issei shouted as he broke the door down, Kiba and Gasper following. He looked around, only to find the room empty. "What the?" Issei said as he looked around. The only sign that anyone was in there recently was the fact that the toilet was still flushing. Issei stared at the water. "You think he-" "Don't be stupid. He couldn't fit." 

Suddenly, the bathroom mirror slammed open and the green faced man from earlier jumped out from the medecine cabinet behind it. "Hey fuckers, didn't notice the sign said occupied." "Hey, you're-" Kiba couldn't finish his sentence as Big Head slammed his and Gasper's heads together. "DRAGON SH-" Issei was cut off as Y/N had shoved a toilet brush into his mouth. "Don't try this at home, kids." Big Head said as he grabbed Issei by the ankles.

Next thing Issei knew, he was shoved head first into the toilet. "Damn it. Get in there, you." Big Head said as he stomped on Issei's crotch. Y/N flushed with his foot before going to the sink and washing his hands. "I can't believe I touched them. WITH MY BARE HANDS!" He said as he made a disgusted face. 

Big Head exited the bathroom only to come face to face with Rias and the rest of her peerage. "DO NOT GO IN THERE." Y/N said dramatically as he gestured towards the bathroom. "Y/N? Oh sorry, I thought you were someone else." Emily said as he walked away. "Wait a minute, you're the guy that stopped us from defeating Trihexa." Rias said angrily as she grabbed his tie. "What would you want Trihexa's feet for. I mean, that Issei kid seems more likely to be into feet, but you? You strike me as a bit of a voyeur." Rias slapped him.

"Oh, so that's how it's gonna be." Big Head said as he ripped off his arm before socking Rias in the face with it. "How dare you." Akeno shouted as she prepared to attack. "But mom, she hit me first." Y/N said as he reattached his arm. "I'm gonna enjoy hearing you scream." Akeno said as she charged forward.

"Okay." Y/N said as he grabbed her by the shoulder before lowering her. He grabbed her ear before stretching it out. He took a deep breath and 

Sorry for not updating. I'll get around to it. I don't own the sound effect. Remember to vote and comment.