Forgetting Reira

Maybe a new start

I don't feel guilty. Is that bad? I really do love Reira and I wish she was mine. Why did she come back now, and I can only wonder how Miranda is going to react. What am I going to do?

The next morning Miranda was her bright cheerful self . She was making breakfast, I sat on the counter facing her. I wanted to tell her so bad what I did but looking at her makes me realize that I have her. She's been there through everything. Yet I still crave Reira. She looked over at me when she was cooking at the stove and smiled.
Hey... Miranda. I wanted to ask her a question because she is one of the smartest people I know.
She quickly glanced at me then back at the stove and kept smiling.
Yes.... Jacob what's wrong?
I hesitated for a second I tried to figure out a way to word this.
Miranda.. do you think people can love the person they've been angry at for a long time?
She looked up and thought about it for awhile then went back to looking at the stove.
That's a tuff one.... was the person important then they were angry at them for something that happened to were they hated them?
I tried to make it were she couldn't know it was me I was talking about.
I guess you could say that. But this person is worried that they will loose everything they worked to have in pursuit of this person. Like what would you do?
She moved the pan to an empty plate and put some bacon on the plate next to scrambled eggs.
She got kinda serious.
Well..... you remember the guy I was dating our freshman year of college?
She asked leaning over the island counter.
Yeah. Why?
She sat up and began moving the eggs and bacon on the plate.
Well... I really loved him and when we broke up I cried for a whole day. But I was eminently brought back to reality when a friend sent me a post card.
I was interested where was she going with this.
The card read "I know the pain is real, but... its time for you to get your ass up and realize that heart breaks are out there. This is one of the many you will receive. This may hurt but I'm willing to risk you coming and punching me in the face rather then watching you cry. So love with your whole heart. If he's moved on and your alone so what just don't fall apart, and wish him nothing but the best. I know its hard but walk as if your heart was never broken."
Hearing that confused me a bit.
Sorry babe but how does that help me?
She giggled and handed me the plate with a smiley face made of eggs and bacon.
Because I realized no matter what I can't stop loving someone that I already put in my heart. All I can do is wish the best or linger on the past.
She stood in front of me and I understood what she meant. I always felt something toward Reira, weather it was hate, envy, love, or it just pained me to see her. I can't pretend that Reira will fall for me just because I changed. Nor can I act like I can win her back.
I smiled at Miranda.
Thanks babe you really helped me out.
She smiled and pinched my cheek and said she was going to get ready.
I realized what I had to do. I needed to say goodbye to Reira and let her go.
I drove to her office. I rushed to her office and found someone taking her name and title off the door. I got closer and saw a bunch of strangers cleaning her office. Someone tapped my shoulder. I quickly turned around and saw Kris.
She's gone.

What did she leave already?

No not yet her plane leaves at 4:30.
I began walking I needed to say what was always in my mind and forgive and forget.
Kris grabbed my arm and gave me a kinda death glare.
Jacob I don't know what your planning but I can't let you ruin her again.

I want to say goodbye and....

And what? Win her back?
I hesitated.
And forgive her.
He stood there for awhile. Then shook his head.
Don't make me regret this. Like the other times.