Rebound

To Kiss A Man

October, 20

I groaned and rolled over, almost off the bed. I caught myself as my eyes slowly drifted open, a sight of a muddy chunky nutella-applesauce smelling puddle right beside my bed. I leaned back, revolted, and screamed.

Dan's eyes fluttered open. He was cuddled up practically under Yani on the air mattress. He slowly turned his head to me, who was now on the far corner of my bed. "Hey man.. you're gonna wake up Yani. What are you screaming about?" He asks, just as his eyes trail down when he notices I hadn't been paying attention to a word he was saying- so he decided to catch a glimpse of what was distracting me. "Did you puke?" Dan asks.

I jitter my eyes, then scratch the side of my head. "I don't.. I don't remember." I replied.

"How much did you drink, Otis?"

I jumped almost immediately. "Get rid of it, get rid of the bottle and get rid of the smell! I'll clean the puke! Quick, before my mom and Felix get home!" I shout, practically throwing myself out of the bed. Peeking through my bedroom door, making sure that hadn't been back yet. Thankfully not, I sighed.

"Austyn was right." I say to myself. "Mom's gonna- wait, Austyn? Why'd I bring up Austyn?" I questioned myself, then gained recollection of the phone conversation we had, remembering I was the one to hang up, but then finding I had called him three other times.

Three.

My heart skips a beat, immediately changing its pace. Faster, and harder. I could feel it beating through my chest, and out of anxiousness and nervousness. "What did I say, what did I say?!" I grab my phone and scroll through it, first looking at our text messages: nothing.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Dan shows up behind me, peering at my phone.

There was a recent text in my notes.

A poem.
It read,

Puppet

He makes me his puppet

He fills me with rose

With the vines and the thorns

Even the root to fill in my nose

To garnish my clothes he adjusts a gusset

With a needle all he needs

To pull just once to tighten my muscles

He pulls to seal my heart

After filling it until full, finishing with a tussle

He makes me his puppet to play with me

He will play until he gets bored

He will ask me what he shall do

"What do I know? For I am just your puppet"

"I only follow after you."

But if I was a real boy, I could do something more

The poem is so clearly about Austyn, but what was I trying to convey? I'm his puppet? Why did I say that?
I'm not that attached.

Am I?

He doesn't pull my strings..
Yes he does. He makes me angry.

Dan stares at me. When I realize, I stare back at him. "Nice poem." He says. "You wrote that while drunk?"

"I think so.. Dan, I'm not drinking ever again."

"Fine by me. It was just a one time experience." He smiles, and backs off to clean the room.