Rámalóce Súle

Chapter 4 - Into the Wild Pt.1

Smoke. 

It surrounds me, choking me.

I can’t breathe.

The bright light of a roaring fire.

Death.

The deafening sound of the living trying to escape the dragon and desolation.

They try to break through the barred doors.

They have hammers, they have axes.

Pound

Pound

Pound.

I sit up in bed with heavy breaths and I jump as the door to the chamber rattles as someone knocks loudly and frantically.

“Give me a moment!” I yell to the visitor and I look out the balcony windows to find it still dark outside, the crickets still chirping.

I throw on a shawl that hangs by the door and open it to find Fili, I frown confused.

“What has you knocking so loudly at this time of night?” Fili looks bashful at my tone of voice.

“Uncle told me to tell you that we leave at first light,” he says sounding almost regretful and I nod at him in thanks.

“Sorry to wake you.” I feel sorry as he leaves and I call his name.

“I’m not angry Fili, just remind Thorin of the last time he woke me before dawn.” 

I chuckle as Fili’s eyes fill with mischief and he nods before walking away with a small skip in his step.

My smile falls as I close the doors and I run my hand down my face.

I’ve had the same dream for years, the people i failed to save. My kin that died, deaths i could have prevented.

Tears cloud my vision as I sob, no matter how many years pass, the loss, the pain will forever be with me. 

I slowly slide down the door as I bring my knees to my chest, resting my head against them as I cry, my heart hammering against my rib cage.

My breaths become faster, and my eyes widen, this hasn’t happened in a while.

I feel as if my nightgown is ten sizes to small and I claw at the collar of it feeling my throat close.

A whine escapes my throat as my panicked breaths become closer together, my vision going white as I felt myself losing consciousness.

Suddenly i'm thrown forward as the door to my chamber opens and a pair of hands grasp my upper arms, shaking me.

I feel as if i'm being held underwater, my name is muffled as it’s called into the dark abyss of my room.

My head is being held against something firm and warm, my ear catching the sound of a heartbeat that pounds against the side of my face.

The pounding not the same as the one from my dreams, this one is warmer, calmer.

I feel my senses start to return and I cry out loudly as i’m finally able to get a gulp of well needed oxygen, I can almost taste the salt in the air.

“Delilah, breath with me.” I hear my brothers calming tone, although I can hear the panic laced in with it.

Another voice sounds from afar, “Is she okay, does she need something?”

Thorin sounds annoyed when he responds.

“She needs space, Bilbo. Please leave me and my sister alone, this doesn’t concern you.” I hear a sniff and a shuffle of feet and I call out as I finally start to catch my breath.