My Bestfriend

Lando

The minute she opens her mouth, the minute she starts yelling I know I fucked it up. <<Really Lando you are asking that>> she is yelling and I go to say something but she continues.<<You are asking that when you were crashing my date with Charles but I forgave you because you are my bestfriend and after that you chose fricking Kiara over me, did you forget our promise?>> She pauses. <<Our friendship over everyone and everything else>> She is right, I fucked it up.

She is hurt because of me, she is hurt because I said something I didn't mean. She should have known that it was just for the interview. She sould have known that I would always choose her over everyone else, it always have been the world against us but right now I am losing her. It will always be her, she is my friend, my bestfriend, the love of my life but right now she is about to leave.

Lando do something she is walking away my mind keeps saying. I grab her arm and beg her, <<Please Cloudy wait>> I say and she turns to look at me again. My heart breaks her eyes have formed tears that are ready to spill.<<No Lando I am not in the mood to hear your apology because I am going to say things I don't mean>> her voice is cracking. 

I let her arm and she leaves and I stay there frozen.

My mind explodes. Shit man you ruined it again and I feel my stomach aching. I fricking hate myself, the only thing I can do right is hurt people. I open my mouth and they start leaving but I don't actually mean what I say. I never want to hurt people especially her but still that's what I do everytime. I am better muted. I just ruined her night and mine. 

I walk inside to say goodbye to the other guys and I will leave. I feel like I am drunk but I am not, my mind is just a mess right now. She is talking to Charles and I read her lips, << I am leaving Charles I am tired, have a great night>> she says to him. I can't see what Charles is saying because he has his back turned at me but she speaks again <<No you should stay>> she says and gives him a kiss.

It's better I leave without saying goodbye to anyone because they will propably understand I am not okay. 

I am a mess right now, I don't know what I am doing or where I am driving but what I know is that I am a fucking asshole. It's around 3am in the morning and the vegas streets are still full of life. I am wondering if this place is ever quiet. People that live on top of the casinos aren't annoyed of all the noise?

I stop at a park and get out of the car. I am walking through the trees and the flowers. It's a lot calmer here, there are barely people in the park and they are minding their business. I sit at a bench looking at the stars wondering how did I got myself in a situation like that.

I hear something from behind the bushes. A little voice whispering, <<be quite he will hear us and call our moms and we will loose the falling stars>> it sounds like a little boy. <<Who is he?>> a little girl says this time. <<I don't know but he seems miserable>> the little boy says and it makes me laugh because I figure out they are talking about me.

<<Let's go now quick>> the boy says again and it sounds like they are walking away. I am too curious to not follow them.

They are sitting next to a tree looking at the stars. The little girl takes her eyes from the sky and she is looking now at the boy. <<Promise me that you will never leave me>> the little girl says. The boy stares back at her, he looks a little older than the girl. <<I promise you that I will always be here, you are my bestfriend>> the boy says.

<<That's what I said too>> I say my thoughts too loud and now two pair of eyes are staring at me frozen. <<I didn't mean to scare you sorry>> I say to the kids. The young boy gets up and  stands infront of the girl <<Leave us alone>> the boy looks more scared than the girl but he is still trying to protect her.

<<I am not any danger but you guys shouldn't be here all alone>> I smile at the kids but I am not sure if they can see me it's too dark out here. <<We will be fine, we want to see the falling stars>> the boy seems more confided now. <<You guys live around here?>> I can't leave them alone here. <<Yes>> the girl says and appears from behind the boy.

The boy looks at something behind me and back to the girl. <<Amanda your mom is here>> and I freeze to the sound of that name. Amanda is  Cloudy's middle name. <<Let's hide>> Amanda says.<<No wait>> I stop them. <<Kid never break your promise because I broke mine and now my bestfriend is crying>> I don't know why I said it but it felt right. <<Idiot>> Amanda says and she is right.

I look behind me and see a woman looking around worried. <<They are here>> I say to her.

<<Why did you do that?>> the boy is mad at me. <<It's dangerous out here kid>> I answer him because he looks like he is about to attack me.

<<Thank you>> a new voice says. I turn and look at the woman that is probably Amanda's mom. <<You guys are in big trouble>> she looks relieved. I can't think how worried she must have been. <<We are sorry>> the boy looks scared now. 

<<And thank you again>> the woman looks at me. She grabs the kids and they start walking away. Amanda waves at me and she shoots, <<Say sorry to her>> and it's the last time I see those kids.

I walk back to the car and the minute I open the door the tiredness hits me and suddenly I want to sleep. I drive back to Hilton. It's past 4am now.

I arrive at Hilton. It's a lot quiter than usual this time. The only place in Hilton that still has people is the bar. I can hear the music coming from the bar and when I am about to head to my room I see her in the bar drinking. She looks different like something has changed.

As I am staring at her little Amanda comes to my mind and her words "say you are sorry" she said to me before she left with her mom and the little boy that I never got to know his name. That's what I am going to do and I am not waiting any longer.

I find myself barging in the bar and walking towards her. She sees me and her face changes emotions and suddenly I am thinking if this is the right thing. It's too late to turn back now.

<<Let me explain myself to you>> I am blinking. <<I never->> she holds her hand infront of me and stops me. <<Lando not now I don't want to hear it>> her jaw tenses. <<You know that I didn't mean it, right?>> I try to sound calm. <<No Lando I don't know anything and I already told you that I don't want to hear it right now>> she pauses and I wait for her to speak again because I don't know what to say.

<<If I ever want to talk to you again, I will come to you myself>> she is so stubborn and she goes to leave. <<Nah don't leave, I am leaving instead I don't want to ruin your night again>> I say sarcastically and walk away.

I open my room door and I put on my pijamas. I lay in bed to think about everything that happened today but I fail and instead I fall asleep.

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I am posting this part a little later than usual. Sorry but I totally forgot about it, I had so much to do. Hope you like my story and how it's turning out.