LIFE'S SUCKS

3

"She's going well, she just need to rest herself and take her medicine well."

"Oh! thankyou so much doc!"

"It's alright Ms. It's our job to take care of every patient out there, anyways i gotta go"

"Yes po doc! Thanks again." I heard those conversations from my Ate and with that Doctor

"My pleasure..."

_____

"Hay... thanks God you're awake!" She quickly run on me to hug.

"What happened?" I ask

"Anong what happened? Ikaw dapat ang tatanungin ko!" Nagulat ako sa tuno ng pagsasalita nya, mukhang makakatanggap na naman ako ng sermon.

"bakit mo yun ginawa?" I just stared her blankly

"Ang alin?"

"Anong ang alin? wag mo akong pinagluluko ah, bakit mo yun ginawa?" I rolled my eyes as she ask again, I really don't get what she's referring to.

"I don't know."

"bakit ka mag swi-suicide?" I frowned when she said those words

"Pardon?"

"Alam mo ang sinasabi ko Arny, sagutin mo ang tanong ko."

"I really don't know, I didn't tried to kill myself."

"Didn't? eh ano ang mga ito?" She took my wrist and force me to see it, I averted my eyes.

"It's just for fun." I gulped when i made an alibi

"For fun? Umabot ba sa pag inom ng Coke at biogesic ang for fun mo? Sa tingin mo ba makakatulong yun sayo, nawala ba yung sakit sa paglalaslas mo?!" I couldn't look straight into her eyes, I'm out of words that's why I chose to stay silent.

"I didn't know that it was biogesic, and I was too late when i knew that the liquid of that bottle was a coke, in short I didn't do it intentionally and it was all accident." I said the truth, I still look my eyes in the window near on me.

"At itong mga sugat mo? lumipad ang blade para putulin ang mga ugat mo?" i bit my lips, imma speechless. I gulped

"Arny naman, kung may problema ka nandito naman ako pwede kang magsabi sakin" I still couldn't look into her eyes, I want to end this conversation.

"Hindi mo kailangan umabot sa ganito" napabuga ako ng hangin sa mga narinig, parang umiinit ang ulo ko, nararamdaman ko rin ang pag badya ng mainit na likido sa gilid ng mga mata ko, but I stay silent, I'm fighting the urge not to let my fvckin tears pour again, specially that there's have someone looking at me.

"Pwede mo akong lapitan at kwentuhan..."

"May magbabago ba..." Mahina lang ang pagkakasabi ko pero sapat na para marinig nya.

Silence...

"Arny kaila..." I cut her off

"Anyways where's Mom and Dad?" I changed the topic, yumuko ito at mabilis na pinunasan ang luhang nahulog galing sa mata nya, i hate it. May napaiyak na naman ako, I'm such a cursed person, wala akong kwenta! lagi nalang akong nangdadamay ng iba.