I love being loved for my weakness // mostly I hide it out of fear// fear of showing up bare hearted// fear crawls to me lovingly // it's innate, I think// impulse of innate too, although fear's inverse //going bare hearted must be impulsiveness must be weakness 00:06
small things happen and they keep you forever 00:21
I need someone to make be patient for them. mostly because I need someone to be patient with me too.
in a friend's father's car this evening we talked about remembering. they both said they would want to always remember their worst memories ever. he said- my most traumatic experience is of falling off the bike when I was a kid. I cut my face. it was dark for a moment then an old man's hand reached out of the blackness. my mother came running from the end of the road, yelling my name.// I laughed and called it something like a "movie memory". I remember other people's words better than mine.
let me go passing by // When Chai Met Toast songs consume my mind. the more people you laugh with, the more things you end up loving.
my hair is messy and crushed and it looks really really beautiful. I love the sound of rushing bicycles, takes me all the way back without crushing.
so many beautiful people, I merge without spilling.
maybe I will hold onto nothing. leave lots of empty space, at least for some time. or a long time. and go meet the tall back dog with my name 21:16
16 feb
