Incorrect Quotes

TADC Quotes

Caine: Fine! I don't give a shit!
Ragatha: You seem to give a lot of shit for someone who claims not to give a shit.

Zooble: Ooh, I like your accent, where you from?
Gangle: I am Liberian.
Zooble: Oh, my bad.
Zooble, whispering: I like your accent, where you from?

Kinger with a shotgun: Hold on! I'm having one of those things... a headache with pictures.
Jax: What the fuck?
Zooble: They're having an idea.

Jax: I think I should be allowed on ghost hunter tv shows.
Pomni: I think that would be dangerous for the ghosts.

Ragatha: What do we say when life disappoints us?
Caine: Called it!
Ragatha: No.

Caine: *gets set on fire and screams in agony*
Caine: Nah, I'm just kidding. Fire does nothing to me.

Kinger with a shotgun: Make her pussy wet not her eyes.
Pomni: Make his dick hard not his life.
Ragatha: Break her bed not her heart.
Zooble: Play with her boobs not her feelings.
Jax: Get on his dick not his nerves.
Gangle: Always salt your pasta while boiling it.

Gangle, at Ragatha: You're my significant other.
Ragatha: Yeah I am!
Gangle, at Zooble: You're my child.
Zooble: Yes boss.
Gangle, at Pomni: You're my bitch.
Pomni: Yeah I am- wait, what?
Gangle, at Jax: My bestie.
Jax: Naturally.
Gangle, Caine: HA, GAY!
Caine: Fuck you.

Jax: Just be yourself.
Ragatha: Really? Jax, I have one day to win over Kinger's parents.
Ragatha: How long did it take for you guys to like me?
Gangle: Couple of weeks.
Pomni: Six months.
Caine: Jury's still out.
Ragatha: See Jax? 'Just be yourself,' what kind of garbage advice is that?!

Gangle: Throw lamps at people who need to lighten up, and throw handles at someone who needs to get a grip!
Kinger with a shotgun: Throw a refrigerator at someone who needs to chill!
Ragatha: Throw scissors at someone who needs to cut it out!
Jax: Throw a clock at someone who needs to get with the times!
Pomni: Throw matches at someone who needs to get fired up!
Zooble: Throw a brick at someone to kill them.

Gangle: Alright, who's hogging the Netflix account? I've been locked out all week!
Kinger with a shotgun: Sucks to suck! I'm already on the 8th season of Friends!
Zooble: Not me.
Gangle: Don't lie. I know it's not Pomni or Ragatha.
Zooble: It's not me, really!
Gangle: ...
Zooble: ...But it might be Caine...
Gangle: You gave Caine access to our Netflix account!?!?
Zooble: They wanted to watch Orange is the New Black!
Gangle: I'm going to kill you.

Caine: I put the pun in punishment.
Kinger with a shotgun: I put the top in unstoppable.
Zooble: I put the cute in execute.
Ragatha: I put the sexy in dyslexia.
Pomni: I put the ass in class.
Jax: I put the D in Caine.

Jax: If you had too, what would you give up food or sex?
Caine: Sex.
Pomni: Seriously, answer faster.
Caine: I'm sorry honey, when they said sex I wasn't thinking about sex with you.
Pomni: It's like a giant hug.
Jax: Ragatha, what about you? What would you give up sex or food?
Ragatha: Food.
Jax: Okay, how about sex or dinosaurs?
Ragatha: Oh my God it's like the movie Sophie's Choice.
Gangle: What about you Kinger? What would you give up sex or food?
Kinger with a shotgun: Oh... um... I don't know, it's too hard.
Gangle: No, you gotta pick one.
Kinger with a shotgun: Um, food... no, sex... no, food... sex... food. Ugh! I don't know! I want both! I- I want hot people on bread!

Caine: If you bite it and you die, it's poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it's venomous.
Kaufmo: What if it bites me and it dies?!
Caine: Then you're poisonous. Jesus Christ, Jax, learn to listen.
Gangle: What if it bites itself and I die?
Caine: That's voodoo.
Kinger with a shotgun: What if it bites me and someone else dies?
Caine: That's correlation, not causation.
Pomni: What if we bite each other and neither of us die?
Jax: That's kinky.
Ragatha: Oh my god.

Ragatha: Hey guys, what do you think about making that beach trip an annual thing?
Pomni, Caine, and Gangle: No!
Jax: Alright, that's it, you guys. What happened out there?
Pomni: What? We took a walk. Nothing happened. I came back with nothing all over me.
Jax: What does that mean?
Ragatha: Come on, what happened? Caine?
Caine: Alright.
Pomni: No. Caine, we swore we'd never tell!
Gangle: They'll never understand.
Caine: But we have to say something. We have to get it out. It's eating me alive.
Caine: Pomni got stung by a jellyfish!
Pomni: Alright! I got stung. Stung bad. I couldn't stand. I- I couldn't walk.
Gangle: We were two miles from the house. We were scared and alone. We didn't think we could make it.
Pomni: I was in too much pain.
Caine: And I was tired from digging a huge hole.
Gangle: And then Caine remembered something.
Caine: I'd seen this thing in the Discovery Channel.
Ragatha: Wait a minute, I saw that. On the Discovery Channel. Yeah, about jellyfish and how if you— EW! You peed on yourself?
Jax and Zooble: EW!!
Pomni: You can't say that! You don't know! I thought I was gonna pass out from the pain. Anyway, I tried, but I couldn't... bend that way. So... *looks at Caine*
Ragatha, Jax, and Zooble: Ew!
Caine: That's right. I stepped up. They're my friend and they needed help. If I had to, I'd pee on any one of you.
Caine: Only, uh, I couldn't. I got stage fright. I wanted to help but there was too much pressure. So, I, um, I turned to Gangle.
Gangle: Caine kept screaming at me, "Do it now. Do it. Do it now." Sometimes, late at night I can still hear the screaming.
Caine: That's because sometimes I just do it through my wall to freak you out.