Blank. I'm so giddy I can't think / Might jump out of my skin / Tonight is one of those inconsequential nights where I don't gain a thing but end with some insubstantial elation / Hibiscus / So vulnerable, but in the dark fortunately / I'm scared and not scared at all / I wear my dark blues and red with nothing to give / but it feels like everything / I want to run and hide / wiped out / but I stay / stay because I love the fear / and it's fear of a nothing / a past / time / hey empty soul where'd you find all that love to give? / I don't think you can hold love inside without fear / and hold fear without love / I'm still struck / but real again / watch for the shifted pitch in my laugh / messy / everything messy / I have enough empty space in me to hold something again / anything / really really anything that could fit in and settle and seep / I don't even mind anything ripped out again / everything is elation / insubstantial / I'm full of love love love / and fear / I love little fears and big fears / for now for today / I circle back / I'm sick of this / but impulse is the only sign of life in me at all / sick sick sick / the fear gets to my head then fizzles to a giddy daze / I'm used to it / I used to be / I don't expect anything / hope hope hope / blind hope without a destination at all / I think / I want so much but I've always lived with scraps of people and memory / I make patchworks / I stipple my details well for anyone who'll look / and then I'll love them for it / eyes voice everything / to all the last pieces / I feel fear and love coalesced / maybe I'll lose my shit but I'll love you through it all 22:05, mar 1
