Naseem-e-Subh

Chapter 17: once again

There was once when Israh and Aneesa had spent too long watching a series on the laptop at night. When they were done, the sleep had already come and gone and as they turned and tossed on the bed with their eyes closed, they found it hard to reach the depths of a good slumber.

So, instead, Aneesa had grabbed Israh's hand and urged her to follow her. Israh whined, too comfy in the bed but she still ended up following her sister. Israh was always more of a follower than a leader anyway.

It was summer so the nights weren't cold. In fact, the weather was as good as UK weather could ever be. Aneesa had gotten a hold of a bed sheet from the storage room under the stairs, and both sisters headed out to the small garden.

It wasn't a proper garden with grass and flowers. Actually, it was just a backyard with unbalanced concrete slabs of mismatched grey, three pots of mint plants in one corner, and a broken back door that stood against the wall opposite the vases.

Aneesa laid down the cloth on the ground as Israh threw the pillows down too that she'd grabbed earlier from the couch. They both laid down and stared up at the sky.

It was one of those rare occasions when the stars were endlessly twinkling in the dark. Usually, the weather wasn't this great and the thick clouds always hid the stars and the moon from view.

That night, the moonlight spilled onto them softly. Aneesa's ring glinted under the light, and Israh noticed how her sister was fiddling with it absent-mindedly.

"Annie?"

"Hm?"

"Are you happy? I mean...about the wedding."

Aneesa hadn't replied instantly. She'd sighed and wrapped her arms around her middle as if shielding herself from further hurt. "I don't know, but it doesn't matter what I feel. I'm not doing this for myself."

Israh turned on her side, an arm under her head as she grasped Aneesa's hand and squeezed it. "Marriage is a big thing though. You ought to...I mean...you should be happy about it, right? If you're not happy then just say no."

Aneesa's smile was small and didn't reach her eyes. "I'll be fine, Israh. Don't worry."

"It's just that...if you'd told ammi and abbu about him before then...maybe things would have been different."

"Maybe."

"Plus...he was too old for you. Right? You were what? Seventeen?!! They call it 'grooming' here."

Aneesa had laughed about it. An abrupt, almost scoff-like laugh. "You're learning big words at school."

She'd ruffled Israh's hair, then pointed to the sky, to one of the brightest stars. "You know how we see the stars and they're like specks in the vast sky?! Because they're so far away. I wonder if they look back at us and see the same thing. Specks. Meaningless."

Israh smiled as she rolled back to face the sky too. "We turn stars and specks into poetry. I'm sure they look back at us as specks worthy enough of poetry too. Not that meaningless."

"Ugh. You and your pretty quotes. Where did you get this one? Pinterest?"

Israh chuckled. "An amalgamation of books and Pinterest, yes."

"There's a big word again. Mammals what?"

This time, Israh laughed so much she snorted. "Amalgamation, you idiot!"

"Hey, I'm not the one doing Literature at college. I can barely get through coding."

* * *

Israh didn't know what exactly to pack, especially pyjamas.