NINE

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A SMILE BRUSHED across robin's face as her eyes laid upon nancy. a pink tint appeared across her cheeks, making her freckles pop against her rose-toned skin. her pale blue eyes were filled with excitement and shock.

robin stood out of the doorway, holding the door. nancy walked inside her room, understanding what robin was telling her.

"i didn't expect you to come over," robin commented, "but i'm really happy you did"

nancy chewed her lip nervously, sighing to herself. she didn't want to do this- to hurt robin. she didn't want robin to hate her, even though she had every right to.

but leading her on would hurt much worse.

nancy knew she couldn't be selfish. even if a small part of her did still want to be with robin, she's with izzy. it wouldn't be right to make robin think she had a chance.

"you shouldn't be," nancy replied, looking down at her feet.

"why wouldn't i be happy you're here?" robin questioned skeptically, eyebrows furrowed.

"because it's the last time i'll be here"

"the last?" robin sounded genuinely confused. "but i've still got four days until we leave"

"i know"

"then why is it the last?"

"i'm not coming back, robin"

those words cut into robin's skin like daggers, making her breath get caught in her throat. she stared down at nancy, both girls looking into each other's eyes. the tension in the air was thick, weighing them down.

"i don't understand," robin managed to croak, her voice unsteady. "why?"

nancy didn't want to say it. she tried, but the words got stuck every time, clawing their way back down her throat. she took a deep breath, reminding herself that it was her own fault they were in this situation. robin deserved to know the truth.

"it's just..." she sighed. "my ex. well, it's complicated. but robin, i'm really sorry. i didn't know this would happen and it was not my intention when we met. she wasn't even something i was worrying about during the night we met"

"it's okay," robin replied, giving nancy a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "well, it was nice for a night"

"it was. but, let's be honest, it would've never worked if we tried to make it more"

robin looked at nancy curiously. "what do you mean?"

"you're... well, you're you. and i'm just a girl from a town you've never even been to until now, who you met at one of your concerts. eventually, you leave, go to another show, and find a new girl. it would never work for us to be together. what did you want me to do, robin? leave everyone behind and tour the world with you? move to new york and live with you? date you, but never get to see you in person because you live across the country? i'm meant to be just another body you get along your tour"

nancy stared at robin in the eyes, a few tears tickling the inner corners of her eyes.

"but what if you were more than just another body to me?" robin responded, her voice trembling.

nancy went silent, the two sitting in silence. they continued making eye contact, neither of them daring to break it.

nancy thought about kissing her for a slight second before shaking that thought out of her head.

"that's what makes this so hard," nancy answered, trying to keep her conposure. whenever robin didn't reply, nancy took that as her sign to leave.

as she walked out the hotel room's door, she left two things behind: robin and a part of herself she will never get back.

-

nancy sat in her car for another thirty minutes after leaving robin's room. she let a few tears run down her face, unable to stop them. the biggest question in her mind was why? why did she care so much about a girl she barely knew?

she felt stupid crying over a girl she just met.

she pulled out of her parking spot, beginning the drive home. whenever she was only ten minutes out, she got a call from izzy. she answered it, connecting it to the bluetooth in her car.

"hey," nancy greeted, hoping her voice didn't sound like she had been crying.

though, if it did, izzy probably wouldn't even notice.

"hey, what are you doing?"

"just driving home" nancy replied, getting off the highway at her exit.

"you should turn your car around and come here," izzy suggested, "i've been craving your touch"

"i'm already almost home," nancy sighed. she wasn't feeling up to going, she just wanted to lay in her bed.

"please?" izzy begged.

"okay," nancy agreed, switching into the other lane. she turned around, getting back on the highway- this time in the other direction.

"by the way, i want your location again," izzy commented, "where were you earlier? you said you were driving home"

"i just went to target," nancy lied, tapping her fingers on the steering wheel once again.

"okay, well share your location with me and come in the door when you get here"

"okay"

"love you," izzy replied, hanging up the phone once again.

-

robin stood in shock in her hotel room, frozen in place. she wanted to go after nancy, to fight for her. but she couldn't make herself move. she watched as nancy left, knowing she would never see her again.

a mix of emotions ran through her, but most of all, she felt dejected. what had she done wrong? she thought she did her best to make nancy know she liked her, and that she wanted it to be something more.

why wasn't she enough?

when she was finally able to move, robin dashed down the hallway to the elevator, but nancy was nowhere in sight. she was too late. robin slowly walked back towards her room, any hope of being able to save her and nancy gone.

she knocked on steve's door and waited for him to answer. when he did, she went inside and waited for the door to close before throwing her arms around him. she rested her head on his shoulder as she hugged him tightly. he could tell something was wrong, so he held her close and rubbed her back to calm her down.

she felt safe and comfortable in his arms, which helped to calm her down.

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