How To Train Your Dragon One-Shots

Where You Go, Viggo

I know this is a joke they make in the show, but it's such a good joke. And I thought it would be funny to play with it for a little bit. At the very least, this was a fun way to spend the last half-hour before Property Law this afternoon. I hope you enjoy!

***

"Alright gang!" Hiccup called out to his fellow dragon riders as they landed on the island they had picked out. "Make yourselves comfortable for the night."

"I call the cave over there!" Snotlout yelled. "I'll need to find a nice boulder to seal it off so I can enjoy some peace and quiet for once." Hookfang growled, and Snotlout quickly added, "And of course you're invited."

Behind him, Tuffnut and Ruffnut walked forward carrying the large hammock they had sewn together (with Snotlout's help). "Well, we call those trees right over there," said Tuffnut.

Hesitantly, Fishlegs said, "But your hammock still isn't-"

"-Oh, it'll work alright," Tuffnut cut in. "Ruffnut and I are positive that we've designed the perfect hammock that will hold the two of us and Barf and Belch. You can't get the strength of a hammock wrong seventy-three times without at least one success."

Fishlegs shook his head. "You two are going to hurt yourselves. Or worse, you'll hurt your dragon." He picked up a small rock and tossed it into Meatlug's waiting mouth.

"Trust the Nut," replied Ruffnut.

"Believe in the Nut," added Tuffnut.

"This is why I called being sealed inside a cave," muttered Snotlout.

The four of them continued arguing about where they would all set up camp. Toothless looked sideways at Hiccup and rolled his eyes. Hiccup put his face in his palm and shook his head.

Fortunately, Astrid stepped forward, and with a raised voice said, "Hey! This is just a reminder that we're not supposed to stay here very long. Tomorrow morning we need to wake up before dawn if we want to surprise Viggo and his dragon hunters. We already went over the plan like ten times, you all know this."

The twins stepped apart, each holding one end of their hammock. "And that, my dear Astrid," explained Tuffnut with a flourishing of his hands, "is why we will be residing in the sky this evening."

"When morning arrives – and oh, it will arrive – we'll be that much closer to getting the drop on our friend Viggo," said Ruffnut.

Tuffnut looked at her excitedly. "Viggo is our friend now?"

"No, bro, it's a metaphor."

"A meta for who?"

Astrid sighed, and walked back to Hiccup. "They're lucky I like them," she said.

"Hopefully it stays that way," replied Hiccup.

"You have to be open to change in this world."

Once the sun had set, everyone finally settled down and claimed their own space. Snotlout agreed to leave the cave unsealed so they could wake him if he overslept (which no one doubted he would). Meanwhile, the twins decided not to bring Barf and Belch up to their hammock with them, though Hiccup suspected that was more because the dragon refused to land on it, and there was no moving a dragon that big when it didn't want to be moved. Astrid and Hiccup and Fishlegs, on the other hand, set up their own bedrolls near the tree line away from the campfire they had set earlier.

Hiccup managed to fall asleep early enough, but when he woke up, dawn was still hours away. He turned over to his side, and nearly screamed.

Viggo and Ryker Grimborn were standing right there.

"Oh good! You're awake. I didn't really want to disturb you," said Viggo with a smile. Beside him, Ryker scowled, and rolled his eyes. Behind him, dragon hunters had bound Astrid, Fishlegs, and Snotlout, and all their dragons had been caged.

Without Hiccup needing to ask him, Viggo dove into his monologue. "No doubt you're wondering how we got the drop on you," he said. "Well, it was trivial, really. You've been searching for one of my projects, and I knew you found it and were planning an attack. The only time that would make sense to attack is the morning, and this island was the best place to stage an attack from. From here, you'd reach us by the time the sun rose, and we'd have to contend not only with your fire, but with the sunlight itself. A bad deal, if I've ever seen one. So, we had to change the terms and write out a whole new contract, one which involved your capture and defeat here."

Raising his voice slightly, Hiccup said, "I think you've missed a few clauses in that contract of yours. Maybe you're not quite the businessman you think you are."

Viggo laughed. Then, he drew his sword and held it so the point was just above Hiccup's chest. "Never, ever, insult my business acumen again, or I will end this all for good."

Seeing the look of terror on Hiccup's face, Viggo smiled. "Oh, this is good. We'll finally have open trading lanes unencumbered by you and your friends. Business will boom, and we'll hav-agh!"

Viggo smashed to the earth as two Vikings landed on him from above.

"Tuffnut! Ruffnut!" Hiccup yelled.

The twins didn't respond. They swung their axes, chopping through the ropes that held the rest of their friends. By the time the other dragon hunters got over their shock of their leader being jumped on, it was too late. All the dragons had been freed, and there was no longer any element of surprise. Ryker grabbed his brother, lifted him over his shoulder, and started running towards the shore.

Jumping onto Stormfly, Astrid called out, "Alright, let's burn their boats then head out on our original mission!"

Once the boats were destroyed and the hunters left on the island, the group proceeded to their target. On the way, Hiccup had Toothless fly over to the twins and Barf and Belch. "So," he said, "that hammock came in handy after all."

"See? We told you it was a great idea, but no one wanted to listen," said Tuffnut.

"Viggo's business may have taken a hit, but this idea firm is on the rise," added Ruffnut.

Tuffnut nodded. "We knew Viggo would know what you were up to, and it was up to us to stop him."

Hiccup shook his head in surprise. "But how did you know he would be there?"

"My dear Hiccup," replied Ruffnut, "have you truly learned nothing from our adventures these past seasons?"

"Clearly he has not," declared Tuffnut.

Together, they said, "Where you go, Viggo."