First

Four

"You said just one drink, Yvonne. Just one," I scolded, trying to drag her to the car. She was pretty wasted so I had to give support and take her to the car.

She shrugged. "Why... are we... leaving so..." She hiccupped, "So fast?" She looked at me.

"Because you are wasted." I took the keys from her pocket and opened the car's door.

"Okay," She said but I was sure she understood none of my words.

After meeting Jason and his friends, she and I had gone downstairs to grab a drink - A DRINK. I was aware of how she contradicted what I just said. She even went against her own word. When we reached our residence hall, we met Mrs. Johnson near the stairs. She smiled at us.

"Let her rest. She looks pretty drunk." She laughed.

"Yeah she is."

I wished her good night and started walking up the stairs to our room. When we reached, I put her on her bed and just collapsed on mine. Neither did I think of changing nor did I realize when I dozed off. I just did, and the next moment I got a hold of what was happening, I heard someone sobbing. It took me a second to register properly but as I did, the sobs just grew louder.

Curious, I looked to my right just to make sure it wasn't her, and as partly expected, she wasn't there, so I eyed around in the darkroom with sleepy eyes to try checking where she was, but in vain.

Sulking, I decided to get up and check where she was. I turned on my table light and as soon as the faint light reached the corners of the room slightly, the first thing I saw was her, on her chair. She quickly turned back, and the puffiness from all the crying sat evidently on her face. I instantly ran to her.

"Oh my god, Yvonne. Are you okay? What happened?!" I was now starting to panic.

Realizing she woke me up, she quickly wiped her tears and faked a small smile.

"Summer, I'm sorry I woke you up... I'm okay, really... yo-you go to bed and sleep, I'll be there soon," She was stuttering.

"For hell sure, I am not going back to sleep and for fuck sake you aren't okay. Tell me what happened, I'm here for you. Talk to me, please,"

Right after I said those words, she collapsed on me and started weeping bitterlly. Witnessing her in this situation broke me; I had never thought a soul like Yvonne could also break down like this. She looked so weak and... helpless. Her strong frame against me shook slightly due to her bitter weeping that it scared me. The defeat that seemed to be burning on her skin and beyond rubbed some of its effect on me, making me realize how horrible she must've been feeling.

"Hey," I whispered. I didn't know what to say but I didn't give up. "Cry it out loud if it helps." She weeped harder at my words. Right at this moment, she looked so vulnerable that the darkness of the night failed to overcast her vulnerability, for it was gleaming on her like a lamp placed in a fully dark room. I could see the pain behind those hazel eyes flickering in the faint light of the corridor. And I couldn't understand why.

I knew I'd known her for less than forty-eight hours which wasn't enough to qualify me to speak about her in such a deep way as if I'd known her since forever, but there are times when you just click with someone whom you have just met - Yvonne was one of those people to me. In just a short period, she had made a place for herself in my heart and our friendship was something that I had grown cherish so much.

"I don't even know what to say," I said honestly. "But, I wish I knew. I wish that I knew."

She wiped her tears as she pulled away. "You are already here for me. That's enough. Thank you so much." Her voice was still breaking but I could hear the honest gratitude in her tone.

"I won't ask you to share but you know that you can. I can be your punching bag,"

She laughed, softly hitting me on my shoulders. "No, don't say that,"

She shrugged then, hanging her head low but her tears had ceased. I gave her the moment she needed. Another five seconds in, and she started. She started her story. And turns out, I was actually right about my intuition.

She and Jason did share a history; a little less than a year ago, they had their one night stand with no intention or hope for anything whatsoever but little did they know, feelings stirred in after just a night which led to complications and fear in both of them because none of them expected this, and love seemed something too foreign and deep to occur to any of them, especially with each other.

So, it ended.

It ended before anything even started.

They stopped talking, fearing it would get deeper which would make it harder for both of them to stay away from each other, and especially, confront. Fear. Fear was the main factor here. They were too afraid of the outcome because none of them knew what to expect, or how to go about it. Everything felt too complicated and new, so before anything could happen to any of them, before either of them got hurt, they walked away as a means of coping mechanism.

"It's almost a year now and these last few months made me realize how stupid it was of me to agree to walking away. Only if..." New batch of tears fell as she spoke. "Only if I had convinced him that it would be worth it, I would've had a different story to tell it to you right now."

I processed it all.

"You know, seeing him today made me sure of how I felt about him," She smiled then, her whole face glowing with something so positive and powerful. This could be nothing but...

"Do you still love him?" I blurted out.

"Huh?" She quickly turned to me, shocked at the question I just threw as much as it shocked me, before wandering off. Her facial expressions told me she was questioning it all because she had never thought about it that way. She hadn't processed this question ever before because there was no one to ask her this. Now, she did. And I was grateful she was finally confronting her fears and her feelings.

"Yes," came her answer, though in a whisper. Her eyes were still lost but the realization was settling in nevertheless. That was enough.

I smiled at her. "Then what are you waiting for?"

Her eyes filled with tears all over again as she broke down all over again, way worse than before, all the progress she had made and the realizations now completely out of her.

"That's the thing. I don't think so he is still on the same page. I think he has moved on," She cried harder.

She made sense but for some reason, I didn't think she lost it all because earlier this evening, Jason showed a strange kind of care towards her, like not the kind of care old friends showed each other. It was evident in how he tried to accompany us downstairs when we decided to go grab a drink and said there were many drunk guys around or how he would always disappeared after a while whenever Yvonne had to go somewhere. This most probably meant he, just like her, wanted to talk things out. How could I also forget the part when he said "we have a lot to catch up"?

"No, there are chances; you are not late. Give it a try." I concluded.

She stopped crying. "What do you mean?"

"Trust me on this. I wouldn't be speaking nonsense if I didn't have hopes."

"But... I'm scared. Things are not the same anymore."

"Last time, fear was what destroyed everything. Don't let it destroy it again, please." I begged.

She looked at me, understanding creeping in as she took a deep breath. "I know. I know but I can't promise anything. Before I do, I need to look at everything to find the right opportunity."

I sighed. She wasn't wrong either. Her fear was valid; the little that was left between them could be destroyed permanently if not done at the right time and place.

"I would much rather be his friend than not to have him at all." She said. "And taking a step meant risking whatever little that is left."

I smiled, stroking her head. "I understand. Take your time."

We let silence take over as we sat there, still. None of us said a word but it wasn't awkward either. Right that moment, I knew. I knew what she needed.

A little help. A little push.