McKinnon

| CHAPTER TEN |

"You look awful." Dean remarked as he and Seamus, joined Sarai on the bench that morning at breakfast. "Did you sleep at all?" 
  Sarai snorted, "Gee, Thanks," She grumbled as she poked her half-eaten eggs with a fork. "Hullo to you too, Dean." 
  Seamus sniggered, "Who pissed in your cornflakes this morn'?" He asked as he began loading his plate with slices of bread and bacon. 
  "mmlaze." Sarai mumbled before sipping her coffee she managed to snag from the Kitchens that morning. Courtesy of Michael showing her the entrance from one of their late Hot Chocolate adventures. 
   "Sorry?" Seamus asked craning he neck to hear her from across the table. She nodded her head towards the Slytherin table to where Blaise, Astoria and two other Slytherin students were enjoying breakfast. One of the Slytherin girls looked remarkably like an older Astoria, so Sarai assumed it was her sister. And the other was a pale skinned slender boy with a small face that reminded Sarai of a rat. 
  "Who, Zabini?" Dean asked when he followed her gaze, "What happened between the two of you? Did he try anything?" He asked protectively. 
  Sarai shook her head, "It's nothing, but a bit of bad news for the three of us," She said before going on to explain how she found out Snap was teaching the upcoming Defense class the Gryffindors had later on that day. 
  The news was a sore blow to her two friends as they both groaned in annoyance. "It's bad enough he teaches potions, but to fill in for Professor Lupin?" Seamus complained, "Is he really that sick, Sarai? Can't he just suck it up or something." 
   At this Sarai immediately clenched her fists, "It Is that bad Seamus." She snapped, annoyed with her friend's selfishness. "Uncle Remus would Never ditch a class intentionally." 
  Seamus flinched at her harsh tone, cheeks tinted red in embarrassment.
   "Sorry." he mumbled while looking down at his toast. And with that the rest of breakfast was continued in silence. 

--- 

   If Sarai thought she was having a rough day, it was nothing compared to Harry Potter's. She sat in the Defense Against the Dark Art's classroom next to Dean, as Professor Snape was complaining about how her Uncle had a lack of "Organization Skills" for his lesson plan. She knew it was absolute rubbish but was not foolish enough to say anything about it. Ten minutes after the lesson had started, the door swung open revealing a disheveled Harry whom looked like he'd just done a lap around the whole school. 
   "Sorry I'm late, Professor Lupin. I--" 
  Harry stopped in his tracks when he noticed Professor Snape sitting at Remus's desk. Sarai winced as she felt a pang of pity for him. Everyone in Hogwarts knew that Professor Snape had it out for him personally.
   "This lesson began ten minutes ago, Potter, so I think we'll make it ten points from Gryffindor. Sit down."
  But Harry didn't move.
  "Where's Professor Lupin?" he said.
  "He says he is feeling too ill to teach today," said Snape with a twisted smile. Anger burned through Sarai's chest as though a fire was emitting from her stomach. He knew all too-well what was wrong with her Uncle. Yet he claimed that Remus was ditching class like a school-boy. 
  "I believe I told you to sit down?" Professor Snape said. But Harry stayed where he was. Sarai watched in fear for the Boy-who-lived's life. If You-Know-Who didn't get him many years ago, Professor Snape was about to finish the job. 
"What's wrong with him?" Harry asked stubbornly.
   "Nothing life-threatening," Professor Snape said, looking as though he wished it were. "Five more points from Gryffindor, and if I have to ask you to sit down again, it will be fifty."
    Harry walked slowly to his seat and sat down. He chose the empty seat at the table next to Sarai. Harry shot her an inquisitive look but she shook her head at him, ignoring his inquisitive look. 
   "As I was saying before Potter interrupted, Professor Lupin has not left any record of the topics you have covered so far --"
  "Please, sir, we've done boggarts, Red Caps, kappas, and grindylows," said Hermione quickly, "and we're just about to start --"
  "Be quiet," said Snape coldly. "I did not ask for information. I was merely commenting on Professor Lupin's lack of organization."
  This made Sarai clench her fists until her knuckles were white. Uncle Remus was not there to defend himself, and here was a Professor who took advantage of disrespecting him any chance he got.
 "He's the best Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher we've ever had," said Dean boldly, and there was a murmur of agreement from the rest of the class. Sarai shot him a grateful look as he nudged her gently.  Snape looked more menacing than ever.
  "You are easily satisfied. Lupin is hardly overtaxing you -- I ,Would expect first years to be able to deal with Red Caps and grindylows. Today we shall discuss --"
  Sarai watched him flick through the textbook, to the very back chapter, which she knew that he understood the class hadn't covered. 
 "Werewolves."  Said Snape. 
Sarai felt her stomach drop from dread. There was no way he made it a coincidence. She knew Professor Snape had it out for her Uncle since he got the job Snape wanted for years, but to do something as cruel as this? She felt herself go pale.
 "But, sir," said Hermione, seemingly unable to restrain herself, "we're not supposed to do werewolves yet, we're due to start hinkypunks --"
   "Miss Granger," said Snape in a voice of deadly calm, "I was under the impression that I am teaching this lesson, not you. And I am telling you all to turn to page 394." He glanced around again. 'All of you! Now!"
   With many bitter sidelong looks and some sullen muttering, the class opened their books. Sarai could barely hear anything though. She could hear her heartbeat pounding in her ears as she began to feel clammy from sweat. 
   "Which of you can tell me how we distinguish between the werewolf and the true wolf?" said Snape. He glanced around the class and paced back and forth. 
   Everyone sat motionless save for Hermione, whose hand was in the air, "Anyone?" Professor Snape asked, "Miss McKinnon?" 
   Sarai looked up at the Professor standing in front of her desk with a menacing smile. "I'm sure you know the answer, correct?" 
  Sarai could feel her palms begin to sweat, as she shook her head slightly, "I asked you a question, Miss Lupin," Professor snape snarled, before being interrupted by Hermione. 
"Please, sir." said Hermione, whose hand was still in the air, "The werewolf differs from the true wolf in several small ways. The snout of the werewolf--"
  "That is the second time you have spoken out of turn, Miss Granger," said Snape coolly. "Five more points from Gryffindor for being an insufferable know-it-all."
   Hermione went very red, put down her hand, and stared at the floor with her eyes full of tears. Sarai could also relate as she felt hot tears beginning to form in her eyes as she stared hard at her textbook. Dean scooted over closer to Sarai and put an arm around her protectively. He glared at Snape as Ron loudly said, 
   loudly, "You asked us a question and she knows the answer! Why ask if you don't want to be told?"
   The class knew instantly he'd gone too far. Snape advanced on Ron slowly, and the room held its breath.
  "Detention, Weasley," Snape said silkily, his face very close to Ron's.
 "And if I ever hear you criticize the way I teach a class again, you will be very sorry indeed."
  No one made a sound the rest of the lesson and Sarai stared hard in her textbook at the illustration of the werewolf on the top left hand corner of the page. Snape prowled up and down the rows of desks examining the work they had been doing with Remus, while the class took notes on werewolves from the textbook. Throughout the class Sarai focused hard on not letting tears from falling from her eyes. She could feel Dean's eyes on her glancing back and forth between his textbook and her face. From the corner of her blurry eyes, she could distinctly see the confused concern on his features as the lesson continued on. She still did not break eye-contact with her textbook. Staring harder and harder on the image before finally, a single tear slipped down her cheek. She could see Dean shift in an attempt to comfort her, when the bell rang at last. But Professor Snape held them back, 
    "You will each write an essay, to be handed in to me, on the ways you recognize and kill werewolves. I want two rolls of parchment on the subject, and I want them by Monday morning." Snape said. Sarai could feel his eyes on her. "It is time somebody took this class in hand. Weasley, stay behind, we need to arrange your detention." 
  Sarai quickly shoved her books and parchment into her bag before hurrying out of the classroom throughout the crowd of the other students. She could hear Dean and Seamus calling after her but she did not care. She ran through the corridors and reached outside the castle to the courtyard. She felt the tears that were held back throughout the class finally begin to fall down her cheeks as she ran through the courtyard and into the grassy fields outside the castle. 
   She felt nothing but fear as she kept running through the fields until she found a tree towards the edge of the forest. She threw her bag down and fell to her knees, throwing her face into her hands. She let out a quiet sob, before the tears began to flow freely down her face as she leaned against the trunk facing the dark forest in front of her. 
  The fear that had encompassed her throughout the class had finally bubbled over, as though it was a bottle that had exploded. She could feel her heart pounding as she found a struggle to breathe due to the tightness in her chest. She sobbed, and gasped for air, through tears, as her entire body shook. She felt hot and cold at the same time, as she desperately gasped. Her lungs felt like they were on fire as she sobbed trying to grasp at any amount of air her body could retain. The fear that shot through her body was like lightening shooting through her. It was as thought every instinct in her body told her the worst was going to happen. She couldn't think, she couldn't breathe. 

  Until she felt a slimy wet lick on her cheek through her hands. Shocked at the touch, she jumped back crashing into the tree trunk removing her hands from her face. Tears were still streaming down her face as she gasped for air, to see the same dog she saw in the corridors that day sat before her. Whining, looking at her with a sense of concern. He jumped up on her body, causing her to cry out as he began licking her face, wagging his tail. The feeling of the wet rough tongue from the dog tickled her face. The feeling shocked her enough to keep her from sobbing any longer. Instead she burst into giggles. Kicking her feet in the air as the dog had her pinned against the tree trunk. 
"Ahh-- stop stop" She said through giggles and tears, "Plea--" She gasped for air, "Please, down!" she giggled. 
  The dog seemed to understand basic instructions as it climbed off of her and sat down patiently looking at her. She sat up and leaned her back against the trunk. Taking deep breaths she finally collected herself. Wiping off the partial tears, partial slobber from her face. She scrunched up her nose in disgust as she could smell the bad breath that came from the stray, 
  "Has anyone ever told you, you need a bath?"

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A/N: As someone that suffers from clinical anxiety, and depression I felt as though the Harry Potter books  nor most fanfictions never displayed an accurate representation for mental health. I would like to make a change to that, as I improve my writing skills. If you feel as though I do not accurately describe these emotions well, please feel free to reach out. I'm still learning.  :)