FROM BIRTH, JEZEBEL

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I am no one's vessel. No god
has touched me. Still, I wait,
nursing a sacrifice in the dark.

It is the unmaking I crave
without the promise of         remaking
or the presence of       prophecy.

Mary is the one to aspire to
but from birth, Jezebel
         has been           a name,
a ligature tied around
my wrists, my ankles—
         tight enough to bruise—
a relentless ache.

My name is not my own
but            my name
is what makes me
almost      real.

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