I Just Pray For Your Fall ||| Cregan Stark

sixteen

Leaving Highgarden was the very last thing Amara wanted when the masquerade was over and they had exhausted their stay. It could have been extended, Cerys wouldn't have thrown them out, but Amara knew Aemond would never agree to it. The eagerness Amara felt to arrive at Highgarden was the seem eagerness Aemond possessed when they were returning to King's Landing.

Despite the pain Amara felt at parting from her mother and infant brother once more, especially since she didn't know when she would next see them, that pain was dampened. What she experienced at Highgarden left her somewhat contented, it gave her a glimmer of hope in her dull life. No matter how unlikely, there was a chance she could finally have the child she wanted and escape from King's Landing. It was that hope that let her leave Highgarden without feeling like she was going to break. Hope that she would return.

Life was much the same when they did return to King's Landing. It was just as dreadful as before, Amara hardly saw her husband, and he spent much more time with Helaena. That didn't even bother her anymore. Not since Amara had a night in her mind she fantasized about constantly. Perhaps it was strange, but Amara felt a bit of sadness when the bruises on her hip began to fade into yellow and then nothing at all. They were a reminder of someone who appreciated her.

Still, life went on. Amara played her part at court and ignored the whispers that pertained to her. Whispers of her lack of conception, what might be wrong with her, and relating the struggles she seemed to be facing to her mother's problems. That struck a nerve and it was difficult for Amara to ignore. None of them had any idea of what Cerys went through to give birth to a son for Carwyn. Let alone to compare Amara's situation when Aemond wouldn't even give her a child.

Things were normal for about two months after they returned to King's Landing. That was when Amara noticed how ill she had gotten as of late. She'd thrown up more days than she hadn't, she felt fatigued, had terrible headaches, and only noticed during that third month that she missed her monthly course and had missed it. When Amara realized it, she was extremely concerned. Wasn't that a terrible symptom of something?

She was quick to consult a maester on the matter, explaining her symptoms to the man and answering his admittedly strange questions honestly. Amara let the man press on her belly, feel her heart rate, and check her forehead, but he didn't seem concerned at all. In fact, he delivered her diagnosis with a smile.

"Congratulations, my lady." Amara was confused. What illness could possibly warrant his congratulations? "You are with child."

Oh.

"Oh."

Oh.

"Aye!" The maester took Amara's shock as pleased shock. "Your efforts with the prince have finally paid off. From my estimation, I'd say you are about a third through your term."

Amara and Aemond hadn't laid together since before they left King's Landing for Highgarden. He thought they laid together in Highgarden but Amara knew differently. The only person who could possibly have fathered the child in her belly was Cregan.

For a moment, Amara felt that spike of fear and panic. She was carrying a bastard and she knew that for certain. The child in her was not Targaryen. What would Aemond think? What would the court think? What happened when it came to deliver the child? Amara followed that same line of thinking even when the maester was trying to tell her the prediction of when the child would be born and what she could expect in terms of other symptoms. Her mind was spinning and he wasn't paying attention to what he said.